


Coming Home

by Captain_Snarry91



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Discussion of Abortion, F/M, Fluff, M/M, More tags to be added, Mpreg, snarry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-16
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2019-10-29 12:20:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 37,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17807828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Captain_Snarry91/pseuds/Captain_Snarry91
Summary: Harry Potter, shunned by a Wizarding World that thinks being homosexual isn’t good enough for the Boy-Who-Lived, finds himself pregnant and alone.Deciding to terminate the pregnancy - because Harry could never properly raise a child after his childhood - he goes to Madam Pomfrey for the process.And then Professor Snape shows up, and sets in motion a chain of events that will not only change Harry’s life, but his own as well.**on hiatus for the foreseeable future**





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've read hundreds of HP fics, and now I've started my own. I am doing my very best to catch any grammar and spelling mistakes, but I am probably butchering the story anyways, because I live in America and have no idea which words need to be swapped out for their British counterparts. My apologies for that (and if anyone wants to sign up to help, feel free!). I will keep an eye on the tags and make sure I add any that need to be up there, but if I miss anything (I likely will), don't be scared to tell me. Constructive criticism is also welcome.
> 
> Now, for the story. I was trying to keep them as in character as possible, but after the first scene with Severus Snape I realized that probably wasn't gonna happen. Also, I'm a hopeless romantic and a sucker for happy endings, so this will probably have both. I will, however, strive to not have too much tooth-rotting fluff in there. My goal is to update every two weeks at the latest, and I'm trying to keep chapters between 8-10,000 words, so they're decent chapters.
> 
> I think that's it. Hope you enjoy!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part One: Unexpected

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Harry sat in the Hogwarts infirmary, waiting anxiously for Madam Pomfrey to finish casting her diagnostic spells over him. Dressed in nothing but the standard thin blue hospital gown, his eyes darted around the room he had spent a good portion of his Hogwarts career in. This part of the school had not been damaged in the war, so nothing had really changed during the rebuild. There were still massive windows all around, vaulted ceilings, and perfectly made beds lining the walls separated by privacy screens.

“You can get dressed, Mr Potter. I’m finished with my examination.” Madam Pomfrey said, adding her notes to Harry’s file as she walked behind the privacy screen, allowing Harry to change back into his muggle jeans and t-shirt.

Harry finished tying his trainers and came out a minute later, running a hand through the ever-present bird’s nest atop his head, with a distracted look on his face. Madam Pomfrey studied him for a moment before turning on her heel and walking towards her office near the entrance doors. “Please follow me, Mr Potter. We have much to discuss.”

Anxiety swirled around him at her tone, but he did as asked and followed her, closing the door behind him and casting a silencing charm. He sat down in one of the hardbacked chairs she had on this side of her desk and stared intently at his shoes, avoiding her gaze.

Madam Pomfrey sat opposite him and placed his rather thick file on the top of her desk before speaking. “Mr Potter last we spoke you told me you’d like to keep this matter private. I understand your concerns, but – “

Finally meeting her gaze Harry held up a hand, cutting her off mid-sentence. He shook his head. “I’m sorry, Madam Pomfrey, but this can’t get out. No one can know about this-this _thing_.”

“A baby, Mr Potter. You’re having a baby. Avoiding the term will not make this situation go away.”

He averted his gaze as a wave of guilt washed through him. He should be _happy_. _Excited._

Instead, all he felt was confusion. Remorse. Anger. Guilt. FEAR. How could he have let this happen? But then, he hadn’t known, had he? How could he protect himself from something he never would have dreamed was possible? Everyone close to him knew he had been raised in the muggle world, yet no one deemed it necessary to tell him.

Wizards could get pregnant.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

When the war had ended five and a half years earlier, Harry had thought he could finally, _finally,_ live his life as he pleased.

They had mourned their many losses. There had been hundreds of witches and wizards killed while protecting the school during the final battle. Professor Sprout had lost her life while helping Filius Flitwick dispatch a troll under Voldemort’s control; the Patil twins, murdered almost at the same time while trying to evacuate the younger years to Hogsmeade; Lavender Brown, killed by Fenrir Greyback.

And Ronald Weasley, who had thrown himself in front of an Avada Kedavra aimed at his only sister, by Bellatrix Lestrange.

Yes, they had all mourned. They had picked up the pieces of themselves and their families and tried to put aside their grief long enough to rebuild the battle-torn Hogwarts – which had borne the brunt of the destruction – along with the ransacked and ruined shops of both Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade Village.

Harry couldn’t stomach the thought of moving into Sirius’ place, so he had spent nearly two years restoring his parent's house, turning it into something he hoped he could live out his life in. He made it his own, settled in. Tried to figure out what he wanted from his life, now that he had served his purpose and Voldemort was gone. He had stayed out of the press as much as was possible for the Boy-Who-Lived-Again.

And then, Harry had come out to the wizarding world as gay.

Life as he knew it was turned on its head. The news had made the front page of _The Daily Prophet_ and since then, he had been shunned by nearly everyone. People he didn’t know and had never met, those that knew nothing about who he really was, treated him with contempt, jeering at him and calling him names when he made an appearance. Homosexuals were generally accepted in the wizarding world without much fuss, but the consensus from the public seemed to be that being gay was unacceptable from their saviour.

Now, Harry was done trying to please other people. He spent most of the days at his flat in London, and most of the nights at one of his many favourite underground gay wizarding night clubs. He had never thought twice about whom he slept with. Never cared about what precautions he was (or wasn’t) taking, no matter how Hermione nagged at him. He drank and he danced, and then he took whatever warm, willing body he found to his bed.

A year and a half had gone by when he came down with the flu and went to see Madam Pomfrey, where he got the shock of his life.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

“Mr Potter?” Harry was brought back from his thoughts by Madam Pomfrey. “You are running out of time. Mr Pot- Harry, if you don’t intend to bring this pregnancy to term, you have very little time left to act before your magic takes the choice away from you. If you have decided otherwise, there are potions you should have started taking weeks ago, and there is information and expertise this requires that I don’t have, in order to make this as safe as possible for both you and the child. There are books I need to obtain, and if you’ll agree to let me bring the Potions Master on to your case – “

“Wait,” Harry interrupted once more. “ _The_ Potions Master?”

Madam Pomfrey nodded. “Yes. The Potions Master. The only one in Britain, who resides right here in Hogwarts. Severus Snape.”

Harry’s shoulders sagged and he slumped back in his chair. _Of course._ Who better to see his humiliation than Professor Snape? They had come to something resembling a truce during the war, but Harry didn’t think they would ever consider each other friends. Harry sighed and considered his options, before quickly giving up and standing from his seat.

Waving his wand and removing the silencing charm, he looked at the mediwitch. “I need time to think about this. I’ll be back next week, Madam Pomfrey. I will have an answer for you then.” Harry made a valiant attempt at a smile and then turned and walked from the office and out of the infirmary.

He needed to see Hermione.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Draco looked up from his spot on the couch when the wards alerted him to someone apparating onto the property. Standing up, he put the latest curse-breaking journal he was reading on the coffee table and went to open the door.

Upon seeing the familiar face, he raised a brow and smirked. He waited for the man to walk up the path to the door before asking, “Can I help you, Potter?”

“It’s Harry, Draco. We’ve gone over this. It’s been three years.” Harry answered, refraining from rolling his eyes. He waved a hand towards the front room. “Is Hermione working?”

Draco’s expression softened at her name. “When is she not working?” he moved to the side to let Harry through. “Come in. You know where to find her.”

Harry nodded. “Thanks, _Draco_.” He said and walked through the front room, heading to where he knew he’d find Hermione – her downstairs office.

Draco and Hermione lived in a charming three-story cottage in one of the newer wizarding communities built after the war. It had a beautiful walkway with flowers planted along the path to the front door, a great big wrap-around porch, and was done in colours of grey and white. The two of them had got together shortly after Draco was released from Azkaban. Hermione had helped him recover after his year-long sentence in the prison when she came across him at St. Mungo’s a month following his release. Afterwards, Draco had made it his mission to secure a date from her. It had taken five months for her to finally give in, but they were great together and to everyone’s delight, had just announced their engagement last month.

Walking down the stairs to Hermione’s office Harry contemplated what to tell her. He had been eight weeks along when he first saw Madam Pomfrey three weeks ago, and he had yet to work up the courage to tell his best friend. He had always thought he’d be able to tell her anything, but this? He had no idea how she would react. Would she think him irresponsible? Think he was reckless, or stupid? Did she even know about male pregnancy? She too had been raised by muggles too, surely she didn’t know either?

Coming to the bottom of the stairs he walked down the short hall to the door of her office. Taking a deep breath, he knocked twice and then opened the door.

“‘Mione? Do you have a minute?” he asked before stepping inside the office.

Hermione’s office embodied everything she was. Great big bookshelves lined every available wall, packed to full capacity with thick tomes on most any subject one could think of. There were two antique executive desks facing away from each other on one side of the room, with a nice leather-backed chair in the middle. There was a cosy lounge area on the other side of the room, with two small sofas in front of the fireplace. The whole room was done in earthy tones and had a very homey feel to it. She currently had parchment and scrolls spread across one desk, and binders full of paper spread over the other.

Hermione had taken her N.E.W.T.’s the third week after the defeat of Voldemort – as soon as the Ministry allowed. She had immediately gone on to begin healer training and at 23 years old was now two years away from becoming the youngest healer in more than 300 years. She also had big plans to study muggle medicine and bring it to the wizarding world.

She glanced up momentarily from the parchment she was writing on to flash Harry a smile, before looking back at her work. “Hi! Yeah, come in Harry. It’s so good to see you. I’m sorry I haven’t been over lately. I’ve been swamped, what with training and then the announcement and now wedding plans and- “

“Hermione!” Harry stopped her. “It’s okay, I know how busy you have been. But I really need to talk to you. I need to tell you something important.”

Hermione looked up from her work and studied her best friend for a moment. She took in his worried (nervous?) expression, sagging shoulders and the dark circles under his eyes that told her he hadn’t been sleeping well, if at all. And had he lost weight? She stood up and frowned at him. “Harry? You look like you haven’t slept in a week. Are you even eating?” she asked, dragging him over to the sitting area and pushing him down onto the sofa before starting a fire with a wave of her wand. She took a seat on the other end of the couch and turned to him, pulling her socked feet up and curling them underneath her.

“How have you been doing?” she asked him, deciding to let him tell her what he needed to at his own pace.

Harry shrugged and gave her a half smile. “Fine.” He responded, knowing even as he said it that Hermione would not accept that for an answer. She looked at him with exasperation and he tried again. “Not well, ‘Mione. I need to tell you something, but it's big. It’s…I don’t even…I’m not sure where to even begin.”

She frowned at him. “Perhaps you should start from the beginning? You know you can tell me anything, Harry.”

Harry leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, face in his hands. He was stalling, he knew. He should have thought this through before dropping in on her like this.

“I’m pregnant.” He blurted out before he had even made a conscious decision on what to say. He kept his face firmly in his hands as he waited for her reaction.

Hermione didn’t speak. When Harry could stand the silence no longer, he looked up and saw something he hadn’t expected, although he supposed he should have. She looked…curious. Harry stared at her. “Aren’t you going to say anything?” he asked.

She raised her brow at him in a gesture that was so like Draco, Harry would have laughed at her if it weren’t for the seriousness of the situation. “I was waiting for you to finish. I’m going to assume that’s not the whole story.”

Harry sighed. “Well no, not exactly. But, that’s the most important bit of it. I don’t know how this happened. I wasn’t even aware wizards could _get_ pregnant.” He said, slumping back on the sofa. He got the impression that Hermione _had_ known that wizards could get pregnant if her lack of reaction were anything to go by.

“Yes, wizards can get pregnant. Of course, it’s very rare, but there are documented cases going back as far as there are records. I assumed you knew this. Why else did you think I tried to get you to learn protective charms?” she asked him.

Harry instantly felt his anger at the situation build and took a deep breath before speaking. “Because you’ve been trying to get me to be careful since we were eleven? You didn’t say anything, no one else mentioned it, how was I supposed to know?” He let out a noise of frustration and closed his eyes. “I’m sorry, Hermione. This isn’t your fault, I know that. Just…what am I supposed to do? I can’t have this or any other baby. The Dursleys, the way I grew up, I don’t have the first clue about how to raise a child. Madam Pomfrey told me I have to decide soon, or my magic will make it impossible to…abort.” He grimaced at the word. It sounded so harsh, so cruel. And yet Harry knew, deep down, that he couldn’t have a baby. Not only because he couldn’t raise a child. The wizarding world detested him enough, he knew that any child of his would have it much worse than he ever did.

He stood up and started pacing around the sizeable office, stopping every few steps to look at the photos Hermione had sitting out on a few of her bookshelves.

“Harry, I know you’re scared, and rightly so. Are you considering not carrying the baby to term?” she asked him gently. Harry put down the photo he had been examining – one of Hermione and Draco’s last anniversary – and dropped his hands, turning to face Hermione.

He nodded. “Yes. I- I’ve made my decision.” And at that moment, Harry knew he had. He just didn’t think he could go through it alone. “I go back to Madam Pomfrey next week.” He swallowed the lump in his throat and forced his next words from his mouth. “Will you go with me? I just, I wouldn’t ask, but…”

Hermione had to swallow back tears as she stood up and walked to her friend. She knew what it had cost Harry to ask for support. Ever since the wizarding world had turned on him the last time, he had made it a point to show that nothing bothered him anymore – even around her, in private. Maybe _especially_ around her. She held her arms out and pulled her best friend into a hug. After a moment she felt Harry relax, the anxiety draining from his body. “Oh, Harry. Of course I will go with you.”

Harry rested his chin atop her head, breathed in slowly and closing his eyes he thanked Merlin he had Hermione in his life. He didn’t know what he would do without her, and he never wanted to find out.

 

 

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part Two: Decisions

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

The following week seemed to both speed by and drag along endlessly. Harry spent a lot of his time in the loo, sicking up any food he had had that day. Otherwise, he could be found in his bed, waiting for sleep to come.

Hermione had informed him that the potion he would need to take took a full four days to prepare, so he had floo’ed back to the infirmary to inform Madam Pomfrey of his decision, and consent to Professor Snape brewing the potion. Even Harry had to admit the man was brilliant with potions, though he would never confess to such thoughts aloud.

Inevitably, the day came for him to go back to Madam Pomfrey. He had decided he would apparate to Hogsmeade village and walk up to the school from there. Being the end of October, it had started to get chilly, so Harry pulled on a sweater over his t-shirt and turned on the spot, vanishing into the darkness.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Harry arrived on the path to the school just outside the village, between Hogsmeade station and the gates to Hogwarts, and started his trek up to the infirmary.

After passing through the tall, wrought iron gates, Harry made his way down through the clearing in the Forbidden Forest that served as the entrance footpath, that lead to the great oak front doors of Hogwarts. The trees on either side of him had turned their various shades of reds and oranges, and Harry breathed in deep, relishing the crisp air that smelled of all things fall.

When Hogwarts came into view, Harry stopped for a minute to admire the familiar castle. With the many towers and the large windows, the clock tower and the owlery, and set against a backdrop of endless trees and beautiful mountains, it really was a thing of beauty.

Making his way through the front doors and greeted the Bloody Baron who was floating just inside the entrance hall. The term had begun nearly two months prior and with it being not even past ten in the morning, classes were, thankfully, in session. Harry climbed the two staircases to the hospital wing and found Hermione sitting on a stone bench, just outside the doors with her nose in a book.

He went to sit next to her, his steps echoing loudly in the mostly empty hall. “Hey, Hermione. Have you been here long?” he asked her, hoping he hadn’t kept her waiting. They had said ten in the morning, and he thought he had gotten here early.

Hermione looked over at him and shook her head. “Not waiting, no. I floo’ed into the Headmistress’ office and had tea with her.’

Harry looked stricken. “You didn’t…you haven’t… _told_ her, have you?” He prayed she hadn’t. While he hadn’t explicitly told her not to, he really didn’t want any more people finding out.

“No, of course I didn’t. I didn’t think you’d want me to. I know how much you hate any sort of attention.” She answered, calming his nerves.

Harry audibly breathed a sigh of relief. “I didn’t. I don’t. I just want to get this over with and go home. Shall we?” he said, gesturing to the still closed doors.

Hermione nodded and stood, putting her book into her handbag. Harry was sure there was an undetectable extension charm on it because the book was much too big to fit normally. He got up and followed her into the infirmary, and when Hermione grabbed his arm, he went with her into Madam Pomfrey’s office.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Poppy looked up from the chart she was notating and glanced at the clock on the wall as Harry and Hermione walked in. She stood up from her desk and brushed the creases from her starch white mediwitch uniform.

“Mr Potter, Ms Granger. I see you are right on time. If you’ll give me just a moment I have just one consent for I need you to sign.” Poppy said, waving towards the chairs in front of her desk. She went over to the filing cabinet she used to hold the various forms she used, and, pulling out the proper parchment, returned to her desk and sat down.

“This is a form that everyone taking the Apstraho potion must read and sign. Ms Granger, if you would sign as his witness, you’ll be confirming that Mr Potter is under no mind or compulsion spells to your knowledge.” She said, gaze settling on Hermione.

Hermione nodded. “Yes, of course, Madam Pomfrey.”

Madam Pomfrey smiled. “Please, you are no longer students here, nor are you children anymore. You can call me Poppy.” Hermione smiled back and she and Harry asked Poppy to use their first names as well.

“Now, on this form, you are consenting for me to treat you, and you are confirming that you are taking this potion under no duress and of your own free will. Furthermore, you are agreeing that you are aware of the risks of this potion, highlighted in section 3.A, as well as the known side effects, which are highlighted in section 3.C. Initials here please” and here she pointed to a short paragraph that had a signature line next to it, “if you consent to any and all lifesaving treatment that may be required, or here on the next line down to deny any lifesaving treatment.

“After you consume the Apstraho potion, you will need to remain here for 90 minutes afterwards, so that I can ensure there are no allergic reactions. Then, three days following that you will need to return for your second dose. Ten days after that, you must come back in so I may examine you and confirm that everything has gone as expected.” Madam Pomfrey gave him a stern look. “You must not miss these appointments, Harry. It could very well have drastic consequences, and possibly even your death. Do you understand?”

Hermione answered first. “I’ll be sure he gets here, Ma- Poppy.” She said, glancing at Harry.

Poppy nodded to her and looked back at Harry before sliding the parchment to him and producing a quill for them to sign with. Harry signed his name quickly and slid the form to Hermione, who did the same. Poppy took the parchment back and placed it in Harry’s chart before filing the whole thing back away in another filing cabinet.

Poppy stood and led Harry and Hermione out of her office and past the many beds, to the end of the room. Here, she opened a door that Harry was sure hadn’t been there before and waved them inside. Upon seeing Harry’s expression, she answered the unspoken question there. “Hogwarts provides rooms such as this one when we have need of them. Please have a seat on the bed and your potion will be here momentarily.” With that, she left the room, shutting the door behind her.

Harry looked around the room then. It was small and plain, with brick walls like the rest of the hospital wing. It smelled musty and unused, which Harry supposed it probably was. There was a standard white hospital bed in the middle, with a dark wood side table on one side and a rather uncomfortable looking chair on the other. There was a small window to the left that was letting in the bright sunshine, with a small sink to the right.

Hermione pulled out her wand and waved it at the chair in a simple pattern, casting a cushioning charm. While she got settled in the chair, Harry got on to the bed and tried to relax. He knew deep down this was for the best – he was single, with no family to speak of, and he wasn’t even 100% sure who this baby’s other parent was. He knew there was no other option for him. Why, then, did he feel so miserable? So…guilty? He sighed inwardly. How in Merlin’s name could he have been so stupidly irresponsible?

A sharp knock on the door wrenched Harry from his thoughts. He called out for the person to enter and was greeted by none other than Severus Snape.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

If Severus Snape hadn’t spent so many years as a spy, hiding his true thoughts and emotions, his face would have immediately given away how shocked he was to find Harry Potter on the other side of the door sitting on the hospital bed.

When Poppy had come to him and requested that he brew the Apstraho potion, he had to admit, even if it was just to himself, that his curiosity had been piqued. He had only had to prepare this potion once before in all his years as a Potion Master, and he had fervently hoped he would never have to do it again. No such luck.

“Mr Potter, Ms Granger,” he acknowledged. “This needs to be consumed within the next thirty minutes, and you must drink the entire thing.” He said, handing the large crystal vial to Potter. Harry Potter was the last person he would expect to terminate a pregnancy. However, he had no idea what he would say next until it was too late.

“Ms Granger, will you inform Poppy that the potion has been delivered. I wish to speak with Mr Potter.” Snape said, his tone making it clear that he was not asking, although it was a useless errand.

Hermione looked at Harry-who gave her a hesitant nod-before she left the room and closed the door behind her.

Harry looked up at his former professor. The man looked just as intimidating as ever and he idly wondered if he would ever feel like anything other than an errant schoolboy.

Probably not.

Severus gave Potter a once-over. He looked worn down, tired, and bordering malnourished. Not that Severus cared. Much. Old habits die hard.

“Mr Potter, I trust you’ve signed the form required and been informed of risks and side effects?” he asked, even though he was certain Harry had. Poppy Pomfrey was nothing if not thorough.

Harry looked at Snape, searching his face for some clue to his motives. He found nothing, as he expected, so he settled for nodding his head.

The corner of Snape’s mouth twitched as he studied the bo- man he had detested so much during his school years. He could see that Potter was not going to give him an explanation without a direct question and he decided there was nothing for it. He would have to ask, and he knew he would have to do it as politely as he could manage, otherwise, Potter would shut down or lash out at him.

He took a small step towards where Potter was sitting, not missing the narrowing of the man’s eyes. Severus resolutely ignored it. In favour of asking the question that had been racing through his mind since he had opened the door.

“I must admit I can’t figure out your reasons for choosing this route. I imagined you of all people would jump at the chance to have your own child. Another Potter spawn to…grace the wizarding world. Is that not true? Snape asked, his curiosity barely peeking through his sarcasm.

Harry pinned him with a look. “No, professor, it’s not. Once again, you’ve shown that you don’t know anything about me and have got it all wrong. I simply refuse to let another child grow up with no real parents, miserable. Termination is the only option here.” He retorted, wondering to himself all the while why he had even answered. His decisions were none of Snape’s business.

Severus raised an eyebrow. “Why would the child be growing up with no parents? Are you planning on dying soon, Mr Potter? And what about the child’s other father, what has he got to say about all this?”

He winced. He’d barely given the other participant a second thought. The men he had been with hadn’t exactly been ‘daddy’ material. Harry’s gut clenched at the word. Daddy. “No, I’m not dying. But I’m not naïve enough to ever think I could raise a child, either. Surely you’ve read the Prophet at least once in the past couple of years?” Harry said, wrapping his arms around himself.

“I refuse to read that drivel. Nonetheless, I don’t know what you are referring to. What has that got to do with anything? If I recall correctly you’ve never put much stock in what the Prophet prints about you.” Severus cocked his head to the side. “Don’t tell me you intend to start now?”

Potter’s expression hardened. “I don’t care what the Daily Prophet thinks about me, nor what anyone else does. But innocent children don’t deserve to grow up like that. Aside from that, I wouldn’t know how to care for a child.”

“I’ve never known you to give up before even trying.” Severus goaded. And damn, he’d been trying to be polite.

Hands balling into fists, Harry stood up from the bed, forcing the professor to step back. “I’m not giving up!” he said, a bit louder than he’d intended. Right now, though, he didn’t care. His emotions were all over the place and Snape wasn’t helping one bit. He wanted to lash out. Yell and scream and throw things. But he also wanted to curl up in a dark corner and cry.

“I don’t know what else to do,” Potter said, so quietly Severus nearly missed it.

“Look at me, Mr Potter.” When it became clear that Potter wasn’t going to comply, he put his hand under his chin and tipped his face up so he could look into the haunted eyes. He wasn’t surprised to see Potter fighting back tears. “Harry, do you really want to do this?” he asked, shocking even himself using the man’s first name.

“No,” Harry whispered, scared to say it louder for fear of falling apart completely in front of Snape. It was bad enough he had shown even this much to the man.

“Then why are you? Have you asked anyone for help? Mrs Weasley, perhaps? She’s raised an entire quidditch team, she surely has some advice.”

Potter pulled out of his grasp and shrugged his shoulders. “I’m not really in touch with the Weasley’s anymore. It’s just Hermione.” And Severus filed that bit of information away for later. He wasn’t speaking with the Weasley’s? Severus knew the youngest Weasley boy had been killed during the war, but they wouldn’t blame Potter for that, would they?

“What would you do, if it were you?” Harry asked the professor.

Severus nearly choked. Him?! This would never happen to him. It had been several years since he’d had anyone but himself in his bed. He contemplated it for a moment before answering. “I would do my best to make sure the child had the best life I could manage.” Potter closed his eyes and Severus felt a twinge of…something…for the man that he pushed to the furthest depths of his mind. He was not going to examine those feelings any time soon.

“Go home, Potter. Get some sleep. Eat something. You look like you could use it.” And where in Merlin’s name had _that_ come from, he wondered. “I’ll speak with Poppy and inform her of your decision. I expect to see you back here in no more than a week for an exam. Now, if I know anything about her, I’d guess that Ms Granger is standing outside the door waiting to see if I’ve poisoned or hexed you, or some such nonsense.’ Severus said and took a few steps back to allow Potter to get to the door.

Harry didn’t understand the sudden shift in Snape’s behaviour towards him, but he would ignore it for now. He had enough to deal with without rehashing the bizarre conversation he had just had with the professor. He ran a hand through his hair and gave the other man a smile, which he thought probably came off as a grimace, and then walked to the door and out of it. Sure enough, Hermione was waiting for him, and he knew her well enough to see the relief on her face.

 

 

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part Three: Information

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Harry floo’ed back to his flat after reassuring Hermione more than once that he would be okay. Stepping out of his large fireplace and dusting the bits of soot off his jeans, he pulled his sweater off and threw it over the back of the couch.

 

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When Harry had finished rebuilding his parents’ house to his expectations, he had hired an interior designer to decorate for him. After giving her some basic requests, as far as colour and such, he had given her free reign. It had been a good choice.

The front door opened to a modest living room on the left-hand side, which was painted in an off-white cream colour. There were two long sofas and a love seat all stationed around a coffee table that Harry had handmade using reclaimed wood from the old house, which sat in front of the fireplace. There was a thick tan rug underneath it all, and sconces along the walls to light the room when the drapes on the front window were closed.

Going through the living room led into the dining room that was done in the same colours. It had a decent sized cherry wood table, with comfortable chairs all around and ceiling to floor windows, and there was a smaller space for the owls to get through.

Through to the right side of the dining room was Harry’s kitchen, his favourite place. He had asked the designer to have it fitted with both magical and muggle appliances so he could have the best of both worlds. The kitchen and the living room were the only two rooms in the house that were wired for electricity. Between the kitchen and the front door were the stairs, with a small guest bathroom underneath and a door on the opposite side of the hall that led to the basement.

With three bedrooms and two bathrooms on the second level, there was plenty of space for him to host friends. The master bedroom was painted a dark blue, with greys and black used for all the accents like his wardrobe, his desk, and side tables, and his bedsheets. It had an attached bathroom done in grey that was magically extended to fit both an oversized jacuzzi tub and a rather large shower.

 

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Harry made his way into the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea, and then returned to the living room, thinking. Well, he was trying to think. He had so many thoughts flying through his head he couldn’t seem to grab hold of one. There was only one thing that stood out: if he was going to keep the baby, he needed to find and inform the other parent. Except, how? It could only be one of three people, but further than that Harry had no idea. Harry walked over to the mantel to grab a pinch of floo powder and threw it into the fireplace, kneeling down on the cushion he had bought specifically for this purpose.

“Hermione Granger’s office.” He said after sticking his head in the green flames. A moment later her office appeared, and he called out for her. She came from around her desk and sat in front of Harry.

“Harry, why didn’t you come through?” she asked him. She had told Harry he was welcome anytime more than once, but it never seemed to matter. He hadn’t walked through without warning even once.

Harry smiled at his friend. “I just have a question, ‘Mione. I need to, uh, find out who the, um, _other_ father is.”

Hermione thought about it for a minute. “I’m assuming you don’t want to do a paternity charm with those that are possibilities?”

“No. I really don’t want this in the _Prophet_ , and if I do that it’s bound to get out.” Harry shuddered just thinking of the media circus this would turn into if anyone found out.

Hermione nodded at him. “You’re right. I don’t think there is any other way to determine paternity until the baby is born but give me a day to look through a couple of books, and I’ll see what I can find. I’ll floo to your place tomorrow. Does lunch sound good?”

Harry groaned. Food did not sound good to him. He really needed to get ahold of some anti-nausea potions if this was going to go on for much longer. “Yeah, lunch is fine. As long as you know you may be the only one eating it.” He told her.

“Is the morning sickness still bad?”

“More like all day sickness. I can’t keep anything down. Sometimes smells even make me sick.” He answered.

Hermione’s forehead creased in thought. “Didn’t Madam Pomfrey give you a list of potions to take? Anti-Nausea potion should have been on there…”

He shook his head. “Snape is going to speak with her about a regimen, I am supposed to go back next week. I’ll be fine until then.”

Relief crossed her face. “At least someone is going to be able to get you to take care of yourself. Okay then, tomorrow for lunch it is. I’ll see you then.”

“Yeah, see you. Bye ‘Mione.” Harry said and ended the call.

That decided, he got up and started upstairs. All he wanted was a hot shower and his bed. Even if it was only just after lunchtime.

 

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The following morning, Hermione left the bed she shared with Draco to get ready for her day. After choosing her outfit for the day – a pale blue blouse with a white knee-length skirt – and getting through her morning routine, she went downstairs to find her fiancé. When she didn’t find him in the kitchen or the front room, she went to look in his potions lab, which was right across from her office.

She knocked on the door – she had ruined an experiment once, just barging in – and waited.

Draco appeared a second later and stepped out. “Good morning, beautiful.” He greeted her with a chaste kiss, pulling her to his chest.

Hermione smiled, tucking her chin in the crook of his neck. “Mmm. Morning. What are you working on in there?”

“Just fooling around. Nothing important.” He said.

“Draco, dear, you never just ‘fool around’ when it comes to potions. But I’ll leave you to your experiments in peace.” She pulled back from his embrace. “I came down to remind you that I’ll be with Harry for lunch today, so you’ll have to fend for yourself.”

Hermione knew Draco couldn’t cook to save his life, and since she absolutely refused to enslave a house elf, she did all the cooking. She had taught him to cast cleaning charms quite efficiently though, and he hardly even whined about it anymore.

He nodded at her. “Maybe I’ll floo over to see Mother. I’m sure she would just love to ambush me with all the plans for the wedding that she has no doubt come up with already.”

Narcissa Malfoy had received the same sentence as her son, which had been reduced to two years of house arrest when Harry testified on her behalf. He had shown the entire Wizengamot via pensieve that he would never have defeated Voldemort if it weren’t for Narcissa lying to him, at great personal risk to herself. She was one of the very few that Harry had spoken for, but she was likely the most grateful. Azkaban would have taken her sanity, and possibly her life.

Hermione kissed Draco one last time before turning to go back up the stairs. When she reached the bottom, she called back over her shoulder. “I’ll be home in time to make dinner.”

“Ok. Have a good day with Potter,” Draco told her. Hermione groaned inwardly. She always enjoyed seeing Harry, but she was not looking forward to the conversation they would be having today. She knew Harry was not going to like it.

 

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“Harry. Harry!” Harry felt someone shake him, but he rolled to the other side and pulled a pillow over his face. He was not even close to ready to get up. What time was it, anyway?

“Harry, wake up. It’s half past twelve. Why are you still asleep?” someone – Hermione, she was the only one with his floo address beside Headmistress McGonagall – and he turned to face her, removing the pillow. He opened his eyes and blinked at her, waiting for the world to come into focus.

Hermione held his glasses out to him. “Here’s your glasses. I don’t know why you won’t go and get your eyes fixed, Harry.”

Harry sat up and rubbed his face before taking his glasses and sliding them on. “Morning.” He said. “Give me a few minutes and I’ll be out.”

She paused and gave him a worried look, but turned and left his room, pulling the door shut behind her.

Harry threw the covers back and climbed out of his warm, comfortable bed. Grabbing a fresh set of clothes, he headed to his bathroom to take a quick shower and get dressed. Fifteen minutes later he appeared downstairs where Hermione was sitting in the dining room, apologetic.

“Sorry, Hermione. I overslept so I haven’t got lunch out yet, as you can see.” He told her, getting a sympathetic look in return. “I’ll make lunch, you tell me what you found. Deal?” He walked to the kitchen and started pulling out stuff to make them sandwiches.

“Harry, about that. There aren’t a lot of texts on male pregnancy. As I said, it’s relatively rare. Aside from the charm to determined paternity, I only came across one other solution. You aren’t going to like-“

“Just tell me, Hermione. What do I need, the heart of a thestral? Werewolf hair?” Harry rattled off, even though from the look on Hermione’s face, he didn’t think it was going to be any potions ingredients he would be looking for.

She crossed one leg over the other and looked at her best friend. “It’s not potions ingredients that you won't like. It’s…who…that you won't like. There is a potion you can take, that isn’t harmful to you or the baby, that will tell you who the child’s other parent is.”

Harry narrowed his eyes at her. It clearly wouldn’t be that easy. “But…?”

“But, the potion is extremely hard to make. It’s highly volatile and requires a great deal of concentration. In other words, you need a Potions Master.” She said, waiting for Harry’s reaction.

To her surprise, he didn’t explode with anger. He didn’t yell or look like he wanted to throw things. He looked…sad. His shoulders sagged and before he turned away from her to stare out the window over the kitchen sink, she was sure she saw a tear roll down his cheek. Hermione felt her heart break. Harry had been through so much in just 23 years, she hated to add to it. And she knew that above all else, the last person Harry would want to deal with right now would be the only Potions Master in Britain.

Hermione stood and walked over to where Harry was standing and put a hand on his shoulder, but she removed it just as quickly when he flinched.

“Harry, I know you don’t exactly _like_ Professor Snape, but he’s the only one who can do this, and do it right. I could go with you, to see him if you’d like? Whatever you need.” She offered. Maybe having an ally there would make things a little less tense, and awkward, for both of them.

He wiped a hand over his face. His emotions were all over the place and he was more embarrassed about crying over something so trivial than he was frustrated at having to see Snape again. He turned back to Hermione. “No. No, you don’t have to do that. I can do this part alone. I’ll just send him an owl and hope he doesn’t burn it to ash before reading it. He was oddly cordial when he came to the infirmary though, so maybe I have a chance. Thank you though. I know you have a lot going on right now. You should be going crazy over making wedding plans, not over me.”

“I’m not- _you_ are not making me crazy. And, Draco and I haven’t exactly started on wedding plans. We still have to figure out a date before we can do any of that.” Hermione told him, finishing the sandwiches Harry had abandoned. “Go sit. I’ll bring these in there.”

Harry did as he was told, and Hermione brought the sandwiches in a moment later, with a jug of cold pumpkin juice from his fridge. Harry was especially pleased to find that he actually had an appetite today. They ate their food in relative silence and when they were finished Harry waved his wand and sent their plates to the kitchen sink to be dealt with later.

They moved to sit in the living room then, and Hermione pulled a thick book from her bag and handed it to him.

“Is this where you found the potion?” he asked, looking at the book. There was a picture of an obviously pregnant man on the cover, with the title at the bottom: The Wizard’s Guide to Pregnancy – Everything You Need to Know.

Harry huffed at the name. He didn’t really need to know anything right now, except how the hell he was going to manage to raise a child, and on his own.

Hermione frowned at the noise. “No. It’s basically a guide for what to expect over the next few months. I thought it had some good bits in there. A few things that you might not want to ask me, or Madam Pomfrey or anyone else about.”

And at that, a sharp pang of grief went through him and he found himself wishing Ron was still alive. It would have been beyond mortifying, some of this stuff, but he knew he’d have an easier time talking to Ron than Hermione.

“Like what?” Flipping to random pages in the book, Harry didn’t see anything that was all that bad, he thought.

She hesitated, and Harry thought maybe he shouldn’t have asked, but she was already gearing up to answer. “Well, there’s a chapter in there on um, physical changes, for instance, some people deal with incontinence during the later months, among other things. And there’s information on, well, on sex during pregnancy.” Looking anywhere but at Harry, she was full on blushing now. Sex wasn’t a particularly embarrassing subject for her, but this was a bit different.

“Right.” Harry croaked. “I’ll uh, look at that later.”

“I bet you’re really wishing for Ron to be here now, huh?” Hermione said, rerouting the awkward turn the conversation had made.

Harry chuckled. “Yeah, I am. Not that you’re not- I don’t mean to say- This would just be less uncomfortable coming from him, you know? I miss him.”

Hermione smiled at him. “I know you do. I do too. Can you imagine how he would have reacted to me and Draco being together? He would have blown his top!”

“He would have, definitely. I would have had your back though. I wasn’t sure about it at first either, but, I can see how happy he makes you. Things have changed now. _He’s_ changed.” And it wasn’t a lie. Draco was doing everything in his power to restore the Malfoy name, and his parents were doing what they could to help.

Lucius had been on best behaviour since receiving his sentence, which included several years in Azkaban and repaying several million galleons in restitution to various families and businesses that he personally had a hand in destroying. From what Harry had been told, Lucius Malfoy helped other inmates where he could, and didn’t cause any problems. 

Narcissa was doing her part as well. She had started a fund for the children with parents who had been maimed or killed during the war, no matter which side they had fought for, and had even done some hands-on work during the rebuild of the school, Diagon Alley, and Hogsmeade Village.

“Ron would have come around though. He had a temper, but he was a good man. I’m sure once he got to know _Draco,_ instead of _Malfoy_ , he would have been happy for you.” Harry sighed.

They spent the next several hours drinking tea, laughing and reminiscing about the days when it was just the three of them. Fighting a troll. Excursions under Harry’s invisibility cloak. Saving Sirius and Buckbeak from certain death. They’d gone through a lot. And then Voldemort happened.

Both of them lost track of time, and only realized it when Harry’s floo flared to life, and Draco asked to come through. He stepped out of the fireplace and looked at the Harry, and then Hermione.

“I know Potter is the Boy-Who-Wouldn’t-Die and all, but surely by now you’ve realized he’s not all that interesting?” Draco said with no bite to his words.

Harry grinned. “Oh, shove it, Draco. I hate to break it to your delicate sensibilities, but I’m far more interesting than you could ever be.”

Draco’s face took on a mischievous look. “Not a chance. And I have the added benefit of being able to sexually satisfy-“

Hermione had stood up from her seat and covered Draco’s mouth with her hand before he could finish his sentence. “That’s enough from you, darling.” She told Draco with a pointed look. “Sit down and play nice and I’ll make us a fresh pot of tea.”

Draco snorted. “Play nice? With _Potter_? You’re supposed to be the smart one, love.”

Harry laughed out loud too. “We’ll be fine, ‘Mione. I wouldn’t kill him before you get your wedding anyways.” He gave a lopsided grin and shooed her off.

“So,” Draco started. “What kind of lunch lasts well past dinner time, Potter?”

“We just got caught up talking, Draco. And how many times have we got to go over this? My name is Harry.”

A roll of his eyes showed how he felt about that. “Had to have been a good talk to make Hermione lose track of time.”

Harry wavered for a bit, then decided Draco would find out soon enough anyway. Harry could only hide it for so long, and he didn’t think Draco would run to the press with this. “It was, actually.”

Just then Hermione came back with a pot of tea and the cream and sugar. Harry took his black, but she knew Draco didn’t. After they had all gotten settled again, Hermione cuddled into Draco, feet pulled up onto the couch, and they had their cups of tea, Harry decided it would be better to just come out with it.

“I’m pregnant. 12 weeks today.” He said abruptly.

Draco, who had been in the midst of taking a sip, choked on his tea and spluttered, and spent the next minute trying to get himself to stop coughing and breathe.

“You what?!? How?” Draco said as soon as he caught a breath. “That never happens anymore! Only in really rare cases, to men with incredibly strong magical cores!”

“Didn’t you have the ‘birds and the bees’ conversation with your parents? It _happened_ because no one felt the need to inform me that it could happen in the first place!” Harry told him, amused that Draco seemed to be speechless now. “And haven’t you learned by now? I’m Harry Potter. If it only happens ‘rarely’, it’s going to happen to me. It’s just my luck.”

Draco didn’t say anything for several minutes, just looked back and forth between Harry and Hermione like he thought they were having him on. When he found no hint of jesting in either one of their expressions, he stopped and looked at Harry.

“Well, Potter, good luck. And, congratulations?”

Harry ignored his questioning tone. “Good luck with what? You don’t think I can do it?” He asked, a bit defensive.

Draco held both of his hands up. “That’s not what I meant. It’s just that from what I’ve read, pregnancy is really hard on wizards. I should say, _harder_ on wizards.” He amended at Hermione’s glare. Not very many have survived it. Although, we’ve come quite a way with medical capability since the last male pregnancy on record, so there is that.”

Harry's face went ashen. He hadn’t even _thought_ of the birth. He didn’t know how that could even work, him being a male and all. And what about- oh my god! Was he going to grow breasts?

Seeing his complexion pale and watching the range of emotions dart across Harry’s face, Draco offered to go through Malfoy Manor’s library, to see if he could find any more books on male pregnancy that Hermione hadn’t come across and floo over anything he found.

“Sure. Thanks, Draco. Look, I don’t want to rush you guys out, but I’m completely drained. I’m so tired, even when I don’t do anything. Is this, is that part of this…pregnancy thing?” Harry asked Hermione.

She nodded at him and, catching Draco’s hand, stood up to leave. “It is. Pregnancy, in general, will wear you out. For the first couple of months is what the book said. Then you should get some energy back. We do need to get home though, it’s getting rather late. Floo me if you need anything though, Harry. Anything at all.” Hermione pulled him into a hug and then pulled Draco to the fireplace. She threw a pinch of floo powder from the bowl on the mantle into the fireplace and in a swirl of green flames, her and Draco disappeared.

Harry carried all their cups to the kitchen and started in on the dishes from the day. He knew he could do this by magic, but it was almost meditative for him after all the time he spent doing dishes – among other things – at the Dursley’s. While washing, he pondered about what to say to Professor Snape and what would be the best way to word his request.

After he finished, he dragged himself upstairs to shower and prepare for bed, and then sat down at his small desk to owl Snape.

 

 

 

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter edited for mistakes 3/26/19


	2. Chapter 2

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Part 1: The Meeting

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          Professor Snape,

               I know I was never your favourite student, but I need to ask a favour of you. I have been told you are the only potion maker who can help me, so if you’d be willing to meet to discuss it, I would owe you one.

               If this is acceptable, please owl me with a date, time, and a place if you don’t want to meet at Hogwarts.

           Thank you,

            Harry Potter

 

Severus sighed as he read over the note for the third time that morning. It had been dropped next to his plate when the morning mail came in. He had recognized immediately the untidy scribbles on the front of the envelope, if not the tawny owl that had delivered it. After giving the owl his last bits of toast, he had promptly abandoned his plate to return to his chambers. He didn’t know what Potter was owling him for, but he didn’t need everyone else to know either.

He reached the door to his quarters in the dungeons and placed his hand on the door. It swung open and he went into the sitting room to his favourite spot on his black leather couch. Opening the envelope, he read through the note quickly, and then again to make sure he had read it right and his eyes weren’t deceiving him.

He scoffed. Such a Gryffindor Potter was, laying everything out to Severus the way he had. Telling Severus he was the only one capable of helping _and_ offering any favour in return? The Slytherin in him thought through all sorts of possible favours he could ask of the man, contemplating which would benefit him best.

 

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During the last months of the war, Severus had come to a realization about Potter. Everything he had assumed about him – that he was a spoiled rotten child, who used his fame to get what he wanted – was wrong, and though Severus hated to admit it the boy had very few, if any, qualities from his father.

After Dumbledore’s death and funeral, Potter, Granger, and Weasley set out on some ‘mission’ he had set them, though the trio refused to tell Severus anything about it. When he was given the order to take the sword of Gryffindor to them, he thought he had the perfect plan all set up. It was simple, really. Use his Patronus to lead them to the sword and get back to the school.

He hadn’t counted on getting caught. By Potter no less.

When Harry had discovered Severus in the Forest of Dean, he’d thought he would have to obliviate the boy right then and there and perhaps use a different approach to deliver the sword; he certainly couldn’t leave it lying around a forest unattended. But Potter had, foolishly if you asked him, hesitated and Severus used this to his advantage.

For reasons he was unwilling to acknowledge, he didn’t want Potter to think he was a cold-blooded murderer. So, he used a body-bind spell and waited (several minutes) while Potter had yelled himself hoarse, slinging accusations and epithets at him that had Severus thinking Potter would never see reason.

Eventually, his patience disintegrated. So, he walked forward, looked Potter in the eyes, and pushed memories into the boy’s mind that he knew he would need to see in order to believe Severus’ relative innocence and prove he was an ally.

Nearly an hour later, after Severus had shown him all that he could, Potter finally, grudgingly, accepted that he was telling the truth. He took the sword of Gryffindor gratefully and led him back to the tent they had been camping out in. There, the boy had explained the situation to Granger and Weasley and they too reluctantly accepted the situation.

Knowing he couldn’t stay long before he was missed, Severus made sure the trio knew he likely wouldn’t be able to contact them again for a very long while, and apparated back to Hogwarts.

He hadn’t seen the three again until after the Gringotts break in four months later when they showed up at the school and explained what they had done and still needed to do. Severus helped where he could, incapacitating the Carrow’s, and then the Final Battle ensued.

Since then, he had only seen Potter at the school’s yearly celebrations and the occasional Ministry function. He knew from the grapevine that Potter had come out as gay and had subsequently been kicked off the pedestal the Wizarding World had placed him on 21 years prior, but he hadn’t heard much else. He was beyond shocked to find Potter in the hospital wing contemplating a termination, but he still had no idea why he had talked the man out of it.

 

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Severus set the note down on the side table next to the sofa and rubbed his hands over his face. First, he needed to meet with Potter and discern exactly what kind of help he needed. Only then could he decide appropriate repayment.

With hardly a thought, Severus summoned parchment and his self-inking quill and jotted down a response to the man, before leaving his quarters to head to the owlery. Easily finding the small black crow that he used amongst the other, lighter coloured birds, he whistled to call her to him and held out his arm. He walked to the ledge and let her hop down.

“Deliver this to Harry Potter. You don’t need to wait for a response.” He told her whilst fixing the letter to her leg. After watching her fly off, he returned to his classroom in the dungeons to prepare for his first class of the day.

 

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          Mr Potter,

               You may meet me at Tomes and Scrolls in Hogsmeade at half six, in two days.

            Snape

 

Harry folded the note he had received and put it in the back pocket of his jeans. He couldn’t determine anything about Snape’s mood or willingness to help by the short note, but he hoped he had at least a slim chance.

When getting ready that evening for Hogsmeade, he had noticed the slight swell of his abdomen that seemed to have popped up overnight. He didn’t think anyone would be able to notice this early on, but he also realized that he wouldn’t be able to hide his growing stomach for long. He was far too slim for that.

Finished dressing – he’d chosen a long-sleeved green button-up shirt and dark blue jeans – he slipped his trainers on and dimmed the lights in his house with a wave of his wand. Then he slid his wand into his arm holster, took a deep breath, and apparated with a loud crack.

 

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Severus was perusing the bookshelves in the back of the overcrowded store when he saw Potter stroll in. He took the opportunity to look the man over without notice. It was obvious the man had gotten some decent sleep since he’d last seen him. The shadows under his eyes were almost completely gone and he had a bit more of the confidence Severus was so used to seeing in him. He still looked like a mild breeze would knock him over and Severus could see that he was at least somewhat depressed, but still, there was an improvement.

Potter’s bright green eyes caught his then, and Severus waited for the man to reach him before nodding his head in acknowledgement.

“Mr Potter.”

“Professor Snape. Thank you for agreeing to see me. I hope you’ll help me with- “

Severus jerked his head toward the woman working behind the counter, who was clearly listening in. “Not here, Potter. I’ll pay for this and we can discuss what you need elsewhere.” He said, walking towards the counter to purchase the newly released potions book that he had been unable to obtain by owl-order.

When he had paid, they left the shop and Severus directed Potter to the Three Broomsticks where he sent him to order drinks while he secured them a table in the dimly lit back corner of the pub.

Potter came to the table carrying coffee for Severus and water for himself. After taking a sip of the hot drink and casting a _Muffliato_ , he set the cup down and looked at the man across the table.

“So, Mr Potter, what is it that you need help with? I’ll need to know the details before I agree to anything.” He hadn’t quite been able to disguise the curiosity in his tone, but he doubted Potter had noticed anyways.

Harry chewed his bottom lip while he tried to gather his thoughts and figure out just how to tell Snape what it was he needed. “I need a potion.” He said vaguely.

Snape gave him a look that clearly said _get on with it,_ so Harry decided he should just put the situation out there and let Snape think of him what he will.

“Uhm, I don’t know who exactly this child’s other parent is, so I need a potion to figure it out. Hermione says there is one, but that it needs to be made by someone with a lot of experience. She, uh, she said you’re the only one in Britain that can make it right. I’ll really owe you if you’ll just do this for me. I don’t know how else I’m supposed to do this except wait until the baby is born.” He explained.

Harry’s forehead creased as he again thought about that. He had discarded that option almost immediately upon thinking of it. He wanted to give the other person time to come to terms with the situation and decide if they wanted to help raise the baby. He didn’t think showing up on their doorstep and surprising the man was a really good idea.

Severus took another long drink of his coffee, digesting the information. _Harry Potter_ didn’t know who had gotten him knocked up? How many people had Potter slept with? He quickly pushed that question to the back of his mind. Why did he care? It was none of his business what Potter did with his life. If Severus thought the man could do far better than sleeping with random people, well, no one had to know.

He knew exactly what potion the man was referring to – there was only one of its kind – and he knew he was probably the only one in Britain who could make it. It was an extremely dangerous potion to make. Just one wrong ingredient – one slip of concentration – and it could end very, very badly.

“You want me to make a _Patria Revelare_ potion for you?” He asked.

Potter shrugged. “Er, yeah?”

 He raised an eyebrow sceptically. “Are you asking me or telling me?” Severus asked.

“Well, Hermione didn’t mention the exact name of the potion, just its purpose and who could make it. I assumed you would know what it was.” Harry ran a hand nervously through his hair, likely messing it up worse than before, and then dropped his hands in his lap. Merlin, he hoped Snape would help.

Snape hummed, searching Harry’s face like he was looking for answers to some unasked question.

The man nodded. “I’ll make the potion.”

Harry let out a sigh of relief and smiled. “Thank you, Prof-“

“On two conditions.” He finished.

Harry’s heart sunk and a lump formed in his throat. He swallowed past it and asked what conditions he would need to accept.

“First, you will owe me a favour, to be decided on at a future date, when needed,” Snape told him, holding up one finger.

Harry clenched his hands in his lap. He wasn’t sure he really liked the sound of that, but he had no choice. He really needed this potion, and he needed Snape to brew it.

Snape held up a second finger and damn, Harry tensed again. “Secondly, you will start taking a nutrient potion, twice daily. If I’m to brew a volatile, complex potion such as this, I’ll not have you dropping dead from malnourishment before it’s complete. You look like you haven’t eaten in a week you’re so slim.”

 _Shit._ Severus hadn’t meant to let that last bit slip out. Now the man would know he had checked him out and start to think Severus cared. Which he didn’t, he told himself. It was just the old habit of trying to make sure Harry stayed alive resurfacing. Yes. That was definitely it.

Harry unclenched his fists and felt the wave of relief sweep over him. Nutrient potions? He had no desire to think about why Snape, of all people, would request such a thing, but he could do that. He probably needed to start taking them anyways, since he couldn’t keep any real food down yet. Maybe he should ask Snape for an anti-nausea potion while he was here.

He squashed that thought. He would ask Madam Pomfrey instead. He was lucky enough Snape had agreed to _this_ potion.

A long moment later Potter’s eyes met his and he held out his hand for Severus to take. “Deal.” He said, voice firm and even.

Severus glanced from his extended hand and back to Potter’s face before reaching out to grasp it. He was momentarily surprised by the feel of the other man hands. He had expected them to be cold, calloused, clammy. Instead, they were…. warm. Soft, slender, and right. Severus suppressed a shudder and shook it once before letting go, immediately missing the warmth. Ignoring the feeling, he wrapped his hands around his coffee cup, now lukewarm.

Harry settled back in his seat, unsure of what to say now that Snape had agreed. He felt a whole lot lighter with that stress off his shoulders. He idly wondered why Snape had asked him to take nutrient potions, but he didn’t think for a second the other man would ever give him a straight answer as to why.

He asked anyway. “Professor, why the nutrient potions? That doesn’t- well, that doesn’t help you at all.”

Severus swore inwardly. Of course, the man would latch onto that particular part of the conversation. He thought about his answer though. Why _had_ he asked for that? Potter was right, it didn’t benefit him in any way. Severus was a Slytherin through and through and yet, he had asked for something so trivial.

“As I said, Mr Potter. You look far to thin to sustain yourself, much less a fetus. This is insurance that I’m not wasting my time brewing this for you.” Severus said, praying to whatever deity was listening that the other man would drop it at that. He wasn’t the least bit interested in discussing it further with anyone, up to and including himself.

Harry rolled his eyes but thought Snape hadn’t caught it since he didn’t say anything; the pub was rather dim. Silence settled over the table, and they both sipped their drinks.

A thought occurred to Severus then. “How long before you need this potion? And I don’t suppose Ms Granger explained to you what is needed to complete the potion?”

Harry set his glass down and put his elbows on the table. “Well, I know you have other obligations with teaching and stuff, so I can wait. I’d like to tell the other parent soon though. Give him time to come to terms with it or prepare if he needs it. Is there a deadline for when I need to drink it?” he asked, and then added, “No, Hermione didn’t tell me any specifics.”

Severus held back the sarcastic comment on his tongue and switched to lecture mode. “The potion takes a week to brew and then needs to sit for 12 hours before being decanted. It must be consumed within a couple of hours, usually within two. It is best to take it between 12- and 16-weeks gestation, before your ‘womb’, so to speak, is shielded by your magic. Any longer than that and you risk not being able to get the information you want.

“I will require two phials of your blood. One to complete the potion, and one for the parchment where the results will appear. The only information the potion will provide you is paternity and gestational age, one of which you should already know. Everything else including when you should expect to go into labour and what the child’s gender is will come from Poppy. Is this understood?” he asked Potter.

Potter nodded. “I don’t really need to know anything else. I just need to know who the other person is so I can get this over with.” He said, and Severus could hear the trepidation in his voice. _Interesting._

“You sound as though you are walking to your own death. Again.” Severus said. Potter winced.

It occurred to Harry that this was probably one of the longest conversations he’d had with his Professor, in the 12 years he had known the man.

“Maybe I am. Hermione and Draco both say this is pretty rare, and I don’t even know who the guy is yet, much less how he is going to react. I just don’t want him to go to the press with this.” And there it was. Harry’s biggest fear.

He didn’t want it getting out that he was pregnant. Not only did he find it slightly embarrassing (why did it always have to be _him?_ ) but the press storm from him coming out had just died down. He still wasn’t sure how he felt about the whole thing. The last thing he needed right now was for the rest of the wizarding world to put in their two sickles.

Harry sighed and checked the time. “I should let you get back, Professor. I know you didn’t come here for me to unload this on you. Thank you, for helping me.”

“Actually, this has been a… pleasant conversation. However, I do need to get back. Do not ignore your end of the bargain, Mr Potter. I will know.” Snape told him and stood up. Harry didn’t doubt it for even a second.

Harry stood up as well and followed Snape outside, heading for the apparition point. He turned and bid him goodnight, and then moved to go the opposite direction but a hand on his arm stopped him.

“One more thing, Potter. How far along are you?”

Harry thought back to his last appointment. “12 ½ weeks, sir.”

Snape nodded and let him go. “Very well. I will owl you within the week to give you the details for when you need to return. Goodnight, Mr Potter.” And with that, the man went down the path to the right that led to the front gates of Hogwarts, while Harry went left.

With one last glance as Snape’s back, he turned on the spot and apparated home.

 

 

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part 2: The Potion

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Three nights after meeting Snape in the pub, Harry was reading _The Wizard’s Guide to Pregnancy._ There was more information in the book than Harry thought he needed to know right now, and he determinedly skipped the chapter on sex, as well as the one on the actual birth.

Harry didn’t intend to have sex for a very, very long time, and certainly not while pregnant. He supposed he would have to read about what to expect during the birth, but he had a few months yet.

From what he had read so far though, he should finally start to have more energy now that he was passed the first three months, and the unrelenting nausea he was experiencing should start to die down. Harry fervently hoped he could start eating more soon.

Now that Harry had decided against termination, he wanted to make sure his son (or daughter) was born as healthy and as safe as possible.

There was tapping on his window and Harry got up to open it. In flew a crow with an envelope attached to its leg, and Harry immediately knew who it was from.

After he had untied the letter and dug in his desk drawer for treats, he opened the envelope and pulled the note out.

 

          Mr Potter

               The _Patria Revelare_ potion will be started this evening after supper is finished. As discussed, it will take 1 week to complete. You will need to arrive at the infirmary on the 5th of November, before 7 pm.

            Snape

 

Harry laid the note on his desk face down and scratched out a “see you then – HP” with a quill from his desk and reattached the note to the bird.

He pet her just once. “You’re Snape’s, aren’t you?” he asked, chuckling at himself for talking to a bird. The bird looked back at him and squawked loudly before taking off out of the still open window.

 _Figures_ he thought to himself. _The man isn’t fond of me, why would his bird be any different?_

This got Harry thinking about said man. Snape was no longer the cruel, bitter man he had known as a schoolboy, nor was he the stressed out, uptight spy he had known during the war.

No. This Snape was…different. Softer somehow. Not that the man had lost any of his prickly demeanour or snarky, sarcastic vocabulary by any means. But being out from under the control of two different masters had obviously done the man a great deal of good.

If situations were different, Harry thought he would quite like to get to know _this_ Snape.

As it were, however, Harry had far too much going on in his life to be thinking of anyone other than the child he would be responsible for in just a short while. There was so much he still needed to do, he thought, making a mental checklist.

He needed to get his hands on a parenting book, for starters. Maybe he would ask Hermione if he knew someone who could teach him what to do, privately. He knew he would need to set up some sort of base of operations to keep all the baby’s things – the room across the hall, perhaps? But then what if the baby needed him in the night and he was too far away?

Sighing, Harry got back into bed and removed his glasses, placing them back on his bedside table. He used his wand to turn down the lights, and then put it on the table as well. He pulled the duvet over his shoulders, fluffed his pillow into an acceptable shape, and fell into a fitful sleep.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

_There were bodies strewn everywhere, as far as Harry could see. Some broken, some dying. Some already dead, from both the Light and Dark sides._

_Sweat was dripping down his forehead and burning his eyes but Harry didn’t dare lower his wand to wipe it away. To do so would mean his death._

_He could see Ron out of the corner of his eye immediately to his left, battling Bellatrix Lestrange with Ginny._

_Harry was locked in a duel with Antonin Dolohov, with Hermione at his side throwing curses as fast and she could get them out. Harry was growing tired, but he refused to let it show. They had been at this since the sun had set, and here it was, pitch black, and Voldemort had yet to make an appearance. He was trying his hardest not to think about what the man was waiting for._

_Harry threw another curse at Dolohov and just managed to hit his calf. The man faltered and Hermione used the opportunity to stun and bind him before immediately turning to her right and aiding Irma Pince in her fight with a vampire._

_There were jets of green and yellow and red lights flying all around him, and Harry could feel the curses and hexes burning as they flew past him. As much as he wanted a break, he ducked underneath a hex and made his way to Ron and Ginny, who were still battling Bellatrix._

_With Ginny in between them, Harry and Ron still couldn’t manage to get more than a simple jinx past Bellatrix’s shield, which Ginny was trying to break through. How Bellatrix was still holding her own, Harry didn’t know._

_He cast a blasting curse at her, but Bellatrix easily dodged the orange jet of light and returned fire with a killing curse. Harry barely managed to jump to the side on time before he felt it fly past his ear._

_Bellatrix was laughing maniacally, almost dancing with each curse she threw at them._

_Ron cast_ Sectumsempra _at her and Harry watched her stumble as it sliced a gash in her shoulder. Bellatrix half scream, half growled at Ron before looking over at Ginny. A wicked gleam twinkled in her eyes at Ginny, and Harry knew what she was going to do before she did it. Everything happened in slow motion then._

_Frozen, Harry watched the sickly green spell fire shoot from her wand, headed directly at Ginny. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing. In a split second, several thoughts went through his head._

_Ginny would die._

_She was far too young to die at war. Ron and Fred and George and all the Weasleys would be devastated. He couldn’t let it happen; he had to push her out of the way, even though he knew it would be too late. He was too far, too slow, too frozen with fear to make his muscles work properly._

_Harry looked at Ron, who looked at Ginny, and then back at Harry. At the last possible second, Ron turned to his only sister, took the half-step needed to be in the line of fire, and shielded her with his own body._

_Ron and Ginny fell to the ground with a sickening thud._

_Bellatrix cackled before someone stunned her from behind._

_Harry screamed._

_* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *_

 

“No!!” Harry woke himself up screaming. His throat was raw, he was covered in sweat, and his hands were shaking so violently he dropped his glasses twice before managing to get them on his face properly.

Adrenaline pounding in his ears as though he’d just come from the battlefield, he felt his stomach lurch. He sat up, ripping his duvet back and bolting for the loo.

He barely made it to the toilet before the entire contents of his stomach made an appearance. He dry heaved several times before he was able to get hold of himself. Harry wetted a rag and wiped his face before walking back to his bed.

Harry hadn’t had a nightmare about Ron in a few months. Sure, he had nightmares all the time about a multitude of other things. Horcrux hunts. Dumbledore. Saving Draco from the Room of Requirement. Barely being able to save Snape from Nagini. Riddle himself even starred in a few of the worst ones.

But ones like this, where he had to relive every minute, every second of watching his best mate be murdered right in front of him? These are the ones that made him wish he never had to close his eyes again.

Ron had been his best friend since he was eleven. His first friend. A constant. For Harry to realize that was over, had been ripped away from him in the blink of an eye had made him all the more determined to kill Tom Riddle, and end the senseless murders that had gone on for far too long.

Knowing he would get no more sleep that night, Harry grabbed his wand and cast _tempus_.

4:15 am.

He pulled his _Wizarding Guide to Pregnancy_ of his bedside table and settled in to read until he could start his day.

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Harry must have dozed off at some point because when he woke up he was slouched to the side, his book was on the floor, and his glasses were in his lap.

After finding the will to get out of bed, he went through his morning routine. He thought he would spend the day shopping in muggle London because if his rapidly expanding belly were anything to go by, his current selection of clothes only had a couple of weeks left before they were too small. He would do his grocery shopping while he was out as well, so hopefully, he wouldn’t have to go anywhere until he needed to be back at Hogwarts.

Pulling on a sweater, Harry set the wards to lock up his house and set out on foot. He was always happy to spend a day out in the sunshine and fresh air.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Harry spent the next week going between his place and Hermione’s. Draco had followed through and searched the manor’s library and came across two books. If they could be called that.

The first one he had found was more of a Healer’s guide. The book was filled with information on the anatomy of a pregnant wizard’s body, the progression of the fetus, and rather explicit details on the birth of a wizard’s baby.

Altogether, it terrified Harry rather than educated him. He had barely flipped through the table of contents and the first few pages after that before he hastily handed it over to Hermione and took the other one Draco offered him.

This one was a journal that was said to be from Balendin Williams, the last known pregnant wizard.

Harry spent the next four days reading the journal, cover to cover. He put it down to eat, sleep and shower, but the rest of the time he was glued to it. To be able to read through another person’s story, with emotions and thoughts and obstacles that were so like his own was a relief.

His emotions had been all over the place lately, and they were driving him absolutely mad. Maybe Madam Pomfrey would have some ideas, hopefully, or a potion to help. He would ask her when he went to see Snape.

Harry had realized that in order to get Snape the blood he needed as well as consume the potion in the required time frame, he would need to floo four times in just a short period of time. Harry abhorred taking the floo. It always affected him more than anyone else, making him nauseous. To have to floo four times, and while pregnant, was not something he wanted to try.

So he had fire-called Headmistress McGonagall and asked if she could make arrangements for him to stay at the school overnight. Harry could tell she wanted to ask why, but she kept any questions she may have had to herself and agreed to find him a suitable room.

Now he just had to get through the week.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

“Draco?” Harry called after sticking his head into the green flames currently in his fireplace. “Are you home?”

“Harry? Is that you?” Hermione asked as she kneeled down in front of him. “Is everything alright?”

Harry smiled at her. Always mothering him, Hermione was. “Nothing is wrong, ‘Mione. I just wanted to give Draco the journal back. Is he home?”

Hermione stood and backed up a step. “He’s downstairs in his potions lab. You can come through and go down there. I’ve got dinner on the stove and I don’t want it to burn.”

He stood up, tossed more floo powder into the fire and spoke the password to get through Hermione’s floo when he stepped in.

Naturally, he stumbled out, but Hermione’s hand stopped him from falling on his face. He closed his eyes and waited for his stomach to stop churning. When he thought it was safe he opened his eyes and nodded at Hermione. “Thanks.”

She smiled back at him. “Will you please let Draco know supper will be finished in ten minutes?”

“Yes.”

Harry made his way downstairs and knocked on the door when he reached Draco’s potions lab.

“You can come in, sweetheart.” A voice called out.

Harry opened the door and smirked at Draco’s back. “Sweetheart? Something you need to tell me, Draco?”

Draco turned and glared at Harry. “What do you want. Potter?”

He laughed and moved over to the table that Draco was standing at, stirring a purple potion. “I only came to give you back the journal. I’m finished with it.”

“Thanks. Did it help?” Draco asked. He pulled the stirring rod from the cauldron and set it on the table and then turned to look at Harry.

Harry just shrugged. “It did. Good to know I’m not the only one. Hermione says your supper will be done in about five minutes now.”

Draco cast a stasis charm over the potion, which had turned clear, and washed his hands in the large sink by the door. They walked upstairs then, and Harry walked to the fireplace instead of following Draco to the kitchen. “Potter, aren’t you staying?”

He shook his head, “No, but tell Hermione I’ll see her in a few days, will you?” Harry knew if he went into the kitchen Hermione would make him stay.

Draco nodded once and walked away, leaving Harry to floo home.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Harry apparated to Hogsmeade and once again walked up to the school. This time though, he went to the Headmistress’ office. He arrived at the gargoyle guarding the stairs, spoke the password, and went up. Harry knocked on the door and waited for a response before going in.

“Professor McGonagall, thank you for letting me stay,” Harry said and sat down in front of the desk she was sitting at. He looked at his former Head of House. “How are things around here?” he asked while taking the chocolate she was holding out to him.

“I assumed chocolate is still your favourite, Mr Potter?” Harry smiled in answer. He had always been fond of Professor McGonagall and he had an inkling she felt the same about him.

Minerva McGonagall had survived the war intact, but it had probably taken five years off of her life. She was still as stern as ever though and Harry fidgeted under her gaze.

“They are as well as ever. You’re welcome. I don’t suppose you will tell me _why_ you need to stay now?” she asked with a questioning look.

Harry bit his lip and sagged in his chair. After all his Head of House had done for him, he knew she deserved an explanation from him instead of someone else. And Harry was certain she wouldn’t go to the press or anyone else with the news, so it was safe to tell her.

Didn’t make it any less embarrassing for Harry though. He sat up in his chair and gathered his courage. “I’m giving blood to Professor Snape. He’s brewing _Patria Revelare_.”

There. Hopefully, that was enough information for her to connect the dots and he wouldn’t have to actually say it out loud. Harry watched her consider this; he could almost hear the gears turning in her head and he knew the exact moment she figured it out.

He was monumentally relieved when she did nothing more than nod at him. “Very well, Potter. You remember where Professor Snape’s quarters are, I hope?”

Harry inclined his head.

“You can go down. He’s expecting you.”

He got up from his chair and bid the Headmistress a good evening and walked to the door. He had just reached for the handle when he heard her speak.

“Harry?”

He turned around and met her eyes.

“Thank you for telling me. If you ever find yourself in need of anything, do not hesitate to come to me.”

“Yes, Professor.” He said, and left.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Severus heard the short, almost timid knock on the door to his personal chambers and stood to open it.

Potter was on the other side. “Potter, come in. There’s still a little over an hour before I need to add your blood, and the fresher the better. I suppose you’ll have to suffer my company for the time being.” He said mildly. “Tea?”

Severus called for his house-elf when Potter nodded, and she appeared a moment later.

“What can Chessie do for you, Master Severus?” she asked, and Harry rolled his eyes. Leave it to Snape to teach his elf proper English.

“Tea and biscuits, please, Chessie. That will be all.” Snape said. Chessie popped out and back in with tea in less time than Harry could say ‘thank you’, and he and Snape sat down to make their cups.

Severus sat in his favourite spot on the end of the sofa and Potter sat across from him in the leather wing-backed chair. He searched his brain for what he thought might be a safe topic. He wasn’t keen on discussing the war and he doubted Potter was either, so that was out. Harry was no longer a student, so that wouldn’t work either.

“How are you feeling, Potter?” he decided on. “Experiencing any nausea or headaches?”

Potter looked up from his tea and raked a hand through his hair. “No headaches. A lot of nausea though. Having more trouble keeping my emotions in check than anything.”

“Well, you’ve always had that problem. Have you started taking nutrient potions?” Severus asked.

The man narrowed his eyes at Severus and then nodded. “I got some from Madam Pomfrey last week, but I’ll need to owl order more if I’m to keep taking them. She seems to think I should.”

Severus agreed. He honestly didn’t think Potter’s pregnancy would progress well if he didn’t take some sort of supplement. “I concur. Male pregnancies are extremely unpredictable and dangerous to the carrier. Probably more so for you. I can recommend a shop in Diagon Alley that you can purchase decent enough potions from. They don’t offer owl delivery though.”

Potter was shaking his head before Severus was finished with his sentence. “With all due respect, Sir, I’d rather brew them myself than go back to Diagon Alley. Why did you say that – more dangerous for me in particular?” he asked, defensive.

“To be direct, you have always been on the small side. Skinnier and shorter than the other boys and men, your age. If you would eat more, you would be a little better off.”

At this, Potter’s hands tightened into fists and his expression grew dark. He stood up abruptly and exploded. “You think I do this on purpose? Do you think I starve myself? Sorry Professor, but you have me mixed up with my aunt and uncle. I’ve seen photos of my mum and dad. I know I’m too small, but it’s not my fault, you arse!” he said, glaring at Severus.

Despite himself, Severus was stunned. That wasn’t what he had meant at all. But what was that Potter had said about his aunt and uncle? Severus vaguely remembered a few rumours through the boy’s school years, but he pushed the thoughts away and raised his hands in a gesture of surrender.

“I didn’t mean to imply you starve yourself, or that you are too small. I only meant that you are small _er_ than average. Sit down Potter, I don’t want to argue with you.” He said as gently as was possible for him.

Potter visibly deflated and scrubbed at his face. Severus took a chance and pushed just a bit.

“What did you mean about your aunt and uncle? You don’t have contact with them anymore, I thought.”

The man across from his laughed hopelessly. “Even if I told you, Professor, you would never believe me. You’ve always had the wrong impression of me.” Potter said, closing his eyes and tipping his head back against the seat.

Severus had been curious before. Now, he wanted to know just what Potter was talking about. He raised an eyebrow, feigning nonchalance. “You’d be surprised what I will and will not believe, Potter. Try me.”

Harry struggled for a moment. On the one hand, this was the man who had always thought he was a spoiled, attention seeking, brat. He could tell him now how wrong he was. On the other hand, he hadn’t talked about his childhood with anyone but Hermione and Ron, and he didn’t think Snape would believe him anyway.

“Fine. My aunt and uncle hated me. They hated anything to do with magic. I lived in a cupboard under the stairs until I was eleven, and that’s where my Hogwarts letter was addressed to. I was rarely fed, and when I was, it was usually food that I was able to steal from the waste bin. I cooked all the meals, did all the cleaning, and took care of all the gardening from as far back as I can remember.

“My uncle’s favourite form of ‘discipline’ was to use his belt on me until I bled. Once though, he caught me sneaking food from the cupboard at night and broke my arm.

“My aunt used to put me in the tub and scrub my skin with bleach until it felt like I was on fire. She was the only one who ever intentionally gave me food, but she insulted me the whole time I was eating. She left most of the decisions to Vernon.

“Dudley was a quick learner. He chased me around the neighbourhood regularly with his friends and they’d beat me up if he caught me. He made sure no one would come near me at school. If anyone tried, they got beat up too.”

Harry felt the tears well up in his eyes and he brushed them away, not caring if Snape saw.

“The day Hagrid brought my Hogwarts letter was the best day of my life. And then I got here. You hated me from the start, Draco insulted the first friend I’d ever made, and everyone else seemed to think I was this god-like hero. Everyone wanted me to be someone I never was and haven’t been since.”

Severus was…speechless. Furious. Ashamed and horrified. He had dealt with his fair share of abused students in his years as a teacher. He always did what he could to help them, no matter who it was or what house they were in because he knew what it was like.

But Potter, he hadn’t known. He was blinded by his hatred of James Potter and he had failed this boy, spectacularly. The boy he spent so many years keeping alive for the only friend he’d ever had. There had been the rumours, but nothing ever hinted at this.

All the pieces fit into place. How sickly and weak Potter always looked at the start of the term. His stubborn nature. The depression that took over when the summer was coming. His willingness to do anything for those loyal to him. The bits of memories he had seen during their occlumency lessons. Severus wondered if he had ever told anyone.

“Who knew about this?” he got out through gritted teeth.

Potter looked shocked, as though he had expected Severus to laugh at him or call him a liar, which made him feel even worse. He should have expected that though. In the past, he probably _would_ have called the boy a liar, maybe taken house points or given detention.

“Dumbledore knew. Molly knew about some of it. Fred, George and Ron broke the bars off my windows before second year, with the flying car. I think Sirius suspected, but I never told him anything.” Potter said quietly.

Severus’ teacup shattered in his hand, but he barely noticed. “Dumbledore knew? And he did nothing, just sent you back year after year?” If the old man wasn’t already dead, Severus would happily murder him. To leave a child in such a deplorable situation was inexcusable and unforgivable.

Potter just looked away and shrugged. “Not much he could do about it, is there? Blood wards and all.”

He took a deep breath to calm himself. _Blood wards._ Severus thought it might have had more to do with Dumbledore’s view of ‘the greater good’. There were plenty of other ways they could have kept the boy safe. Fidelius charms, wards, unplottable houses, Order members…something, anything, would have been better than leaving an innocent child with their abusive relatives.

“Potter, an apology now is useless and unnecessary, because it won't change anything. But I am truly sorry that Dumbledore left you in that house.” Severus said. He had never been more sincere in his life.

Harry looked at Snape for a very long time. He couldn’t believe that the man actually believed him, much less was angry on his behalf.

“Can I ask you something, Professor?”

When Snape nodded, he asked, “Would you call me Harry, instead of Potter? I’m not James.”

Severus considered this. No, the man in front of him was nothing like James Potter. He had noticed a while back, but this just proved it more. Po-Harry had James’ hair and glasses, and he had Lily’s eyes and kindness, her loyalty and courage. But he was more than his parents. He was his own man and Severus regretted not seeing it earlier. If he had given the boy a chance, how different would life have been for him?

He nodded. “I can do that if you’ll call me Severus. Agreed?”

Potter agreed, and Severus stood up. “We can go take your blood now. Come with me, but don’t touch anything until I say.”

Snape led Harry through a door in between two bookshelves and down a short corridor. They reached another door and Snape took out his wand. “Put your palm on the door, here.” He indicated a spot about halfway down. Harry put his hand there and Snape said a short incantation. The door glowed blue as soon as he stopped speaking, and Snape told him he could put his hand down.

“Your magical signature will be recognized now. You just have to put your hand on the door, and it will open for you.” Snape told him and opened the door.  Harry walked in after him and realized he was in Snape’s private potions lab.

“There’s a sofa over there you can sit on. I just need to grab a phial and a syringe.” Snape told him while directing him to the side of the lab where there were a small table and sofa. Harry sat down and waited.

Severus grabbed what he needed and went to sit by the other man. “Hold your arm out, Harry. Palm facing up. Do you want a numbing spell?” he asked. Potter shook his head, so Severus cleaned his arm, and took his blood quickly before casting a mild healing charm.

“You should remain sitting for a few minutes, so you don’t get dizzy. I didn’t take much, but it is better to err on the side of caution.”

“Okay. How long till I need to drink the potion?” Harry asked. He knew Snape had told him when they met, but he couldn’t remember, and he was anxious to know how much time was left.

Snape was adding Harry’s blood to the cauldron, and it emitted a gurgling sound before he turned to face Harry. “It still needs to sit for 12 hours so the blood can bind properly and then I can portion out what you need. I recommend waiting ten minutes or so for it to cool, but then you’ll need to drink it within two hours.” He checked his watch. “So between 7 and 9 am tomorrow morning.”

Harry groaned at that and closed his eyes, sitting back. These days he was having trouble dragging himself from bed before 10. He hoped he got that surge of energy his book talked about, and soon.

“I should get to my room then. I’m really tired lately.”

Snape nodded at him, picked up his wand, and followed Harry through the lab back to his front room. Harry turned when he reached the door to leave and found Snape close behind him. _Very close._

Harry was instantly wide awake, and his heart was racing. He could feel Snape’s breath ghosting over his face. He could see the depths of his black onyx coloured eyes. Snape smelled of potions and leather and the Forbidden Forest after a rainstorm. A thought that Harry could easily get addicted to that smell lodged itself in Harry’s mind.

Snape glanced down at his lips, and then back up rapidly. He held his gaze for what seemed like forever and then sighed and took a step back, breaking the spell.

Harry fumbled for the door handle behind him. “Goodnight, Pro-Severus.” He stuttered out and opened the door.

Snape inclined his head. “Goodnight, Harry.”

Harry walked out and made his way quickly through the nearly silent stone corridors and back to the quarters he was keeping tonight. He spoke the password, went in, and closed and locked the door behind him before putting his forehead and palms on it as though that would keep the thoughts from his room.

What was he thinking? This was _Snape_. The man who, until tonight, he would have bet his entire vault at Gringotts had hated him his entire school career. The man who had made Harry’s life hell, along with Ron and Hermione, and most every other Gryffindor. Snape was near twice his age, old enough to be his father!

There was something wrong with him, and Harry bet it was pregnancy related. _Yes_! That was it. Hadn’t his book mentioned something about increased libido? That had to be it. Harry had been having sex nearly every night until he found out he was pregnant. That was weeks ago, you couldn’t expect a man to go from that to not having sex ever and expect him not to be a little…lustful.

Harry pushed the thoughts that were vying for attention in his brain to the darkest, furthest corner of his mind, and went into the bedroom. He quickly stripped down for bed, brushed his teeth, and crawled in between the sheets. He laid in the bed and tried very hard not to think of Snape, or how gorgeous his eyes were up close, and closed his eyes to sleep.

Harry dreamt of the forest that night.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Severus closed the door behind Harry and took in a deep breath. His heart was pounding in his ears as though he’d just run a marathon. What in Merlin’s name had come over him?

He had followed the man to the door, but he hadn’t expected him to turn around so abruptly. All at once they were standing far too close and Severus was very aware of the man standing a hairsbreadth away from him, the spy in him taking in everything he could.

Harry smelled of apple scented body soap and tea, with a hint of rich chocolate that he must have had before he came to see Severus.

And then Severus had looked into Harry’s deep forest green eyes and down to his perfectly pink kissable mouth, and he had suddenly become overwhelmed with thoughts of kissing the man in front of him. He could see the hesitation in Harry’s eyes and knew that it was because Severus was too close for comfort. He sighed and moved back, and told the man goodnight.

Snape walked back to his lab to check on Harry’s potion and set the wards to lock up, and then got ready for bed thinking all the while.

He didn’t know what happened back there, but he would definitely have to keep his distance. Because this was Harry Potter he was thinking about. _Pregnant_ Harry Potter, at that. Nothing between them, aside from friendship would ever, could ever work, not least because he didn’t deserve such a person as Harry. He had got this man's parents killed, had killed people himself. He had followed the Dark Lord willingly before seeing the proverbial light and he had treated this man horribly during his school years.

And now that Severus knew what Harry’s home life had been like, his treatment of the boy was that much more abysmal.

Harry had likely only hesitated because he was disgusted with his former professor, and he knew the man had every right to be. It was these thoughts that he went to bed with.

Severus dreamt of grasping for a green-eyed little boy that he just couldn’t quite reach.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So my goal is to update every two weeks. But, there are some health issues with my nephew right now that I'm dealing with, so if it doesn't get updated that fast (slow), just know it won't be abandoned. What do you guys think of the way I did the Horcrux hunt in this one? Too unbelievable?
> 
> Edited 3/26/19 for mistakes.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it's a shorter chapter than usual. It took me longer than normal to beat this one into submission, that's why its also late. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯. This chapter isn't beta'd. All my beta's seem to keep disappearing on me (seriously, I think I've been through 5 or 6). So if there are mistakes, please point them out.
> 
> Enjoy!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part 1: The Father

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

When Severus opened the door to allow Harry into his quarters the following morning, the man looked as tired as Severus felt. A wave of sympathy at his obviously tired face rolled through him before he could squash it, so Severus spoke to divert Harry’s attention.

“Rough night, Potter?”

Harry looked back at him and shrugged. “I didn’t get much sleep. And, it’s Harry now, remember?”

“Ah yes. Now, are you ready for this? I’ve already set the potion out to cool, so it’s ready when you are.” Severus motioned to the door that led to his potions lab.

“I’m ready,” Harry said with a nod. Severus led him through to the lab, this time to a waist-high table that had a knife and parchment already laid out on it.

He handed Harry the knife. “You’ll need to put a drop or two of your blood on the parchment at the top. From your finger, will suffice. You'll drink the potion, I’ll speak a short incantation, and the results will appear down the page.”

Harry pricked his finger with a wince and dripped the blood on the parchment before he cast a healing charm over the small cut. Severus handed him the potion and he drank the entire thing in two swallows, grimacing at the taste. Why potions always tasted foul, he would never know.

“Puer paternitas in sanguine revelare,” Severus said in a low voice while waving his wand in a circular motion.

As soon as he lowered his wand the blood dispersed across the parchment, much as it did with the marauder's map. While Harry watched the words spread down the page, Severus watched his face. After last night, he was hyperaware of Harry. He noticed the expressions flittering across his face; amazement, because he still came across magic that could surprise him and hesitation, almost like he didn’t want to know what the potion would reveal.

He took in Harry’s sharp jawline and the stubble creeping across it. He looked at the green eyes that had haunted his dreams the night before, and the dark hair that was messy no matter what he did. Lowering his gaze, he noticed the very small swell of Harry’s stomach through his thin white t-shirt.  Harry was in dark blue jeans today, and Severus had to admit they fit him very well.

When he looked back at Harry’s face, he was startled to find green eyes looking back at him. To hide his embarrassment at being caught, he picked up the parchment.

“It’s done.” He said, handing it to the man. He badly wanted to look at it, but he would probably find out soon enough.

Harry looked down at the parchment in his hands and sighed before handing it back and leaving the potions lab.

Severus wondered why Harry seemed upset until he read the results.

      **Paternal Mother:** Harry James Potter _(b. 31 July 1980; d.-)_

      **Paternal Father:** Michael Lewis Anderson _(b. 1 June 1966; d.-)_

      **Conception:** 2 August 2003

He sucked in a breath. Michael Anderson hadn’t been one of his housemates, but Severus knew who the man was. He was well known in the wizarding world, mainly because he was head of one of the biggest up and coming wizarding law firms, Anderson and Braun. He was also known for being a mean bastard, worse even than Snape. Severus was sure Michael was married as well, so he went to look for Harry to find out what had happened.

Severus found Harry on his couch with his head in his hands and his arms on his knees. It took him a short moment to decide to sit next to him, close but not touching. He didn’t think Harry would appreciate that.

He wouldn’t either! There was no reason for him to want to touch the other man, but a small part of him did, nonetheless. He ignored it.

“Harry? Did you know he was a possibility?” Severus asked gently.

The man took so long to answer Severus was beginning to think he wouldn’t speak at all. Finally, Harry lifted his head. “No. I don’t even remember meeting him. The results have to be wrong.”

“The results aren’t wrong. He may have been using a glamour, or Polyjuice, but the magic doesn’t lie.” He paused, then asked the most pressing question. “Harry, do you know who this man is?” he questioned.

Harry looked at Severus and shook his head. He sighed and sat back on the couch, trying and failing to ignore the exposed stretch of skin just above Harry’s jeans. He wondered what that skin would feel like underneath his fingers. Soft and warm like Harry’s hands were, or…

Severus shook his head and banished the thought before it could go very far. Harry needed to know what he was in for. He _didn’t_ need Severus to start…whatever it was he was starting.

“He’s the ‘Anderson’ of Anderson and Braun. The law firm, have you heard of it?” Harry nodded. “Right, then you should know he’s not a nice man, to put it mildly. He has a temper that rivals mine, a cruel streak a mile wide, and he’s bonded. To a _witch._ ” He added to clarify. “Are you sure you want him to know this is his child?”

Harry considered Severus’ question. He did want this man to know he had a child coming because if the roles were reversed, Harry would want to know. But the fact that the man was bonded to a witch – what was he doing in a gay club? Harry thought back to his own coming out. Maybe Michael was afraid of the press’ reaction and its effect on his law firm. Harry could definitely sympathize with that. Perhaps they could come to some sort of agreement; if the man had his own law firm, certainly he could draw up with a reasonable custody agreement.

He looked up at Severus. He appreciated the man trying to look out for him, but he knew he had to do the right thing. “I have to tell him. I would want to know if I were in his spot. He might want to see the baby or have the baby over to his house. I think he deserves that chance, don’t you?”

Severus frowned at him. “Always the Gryffindor.” He said, with no bite to his words.

Harry gave him a faint smile and nodded. “I couldn’t be anything else. I need to thank you, Severus. For making the potion for me. And, and for talking with me last night.” He wasn’t going to mention the almost-something-but-nothing that had gone on between them at the door last night. Harry was certain Severus would only taunt him for imagining it was more than it was, even if he’d seen the unmistakable look of want in Severus’ eyes.

“I don’t require thanks. You still owe me a favour in return. But, you are welcome. I am unexpectedly…grateful, that you trusted me enough to tell me what you did last night, Harry.

He looked away. For so many years all Harry had wanted was to tell Snape the truth – about his home life, his unwanted fame, everything – to prove that he wasn’t the spoiled rotten child that Snape saw him as, nor was he a carbon copy of his father. But last night, when Harry had told Severus about his past, he hadn’t done it to prove a point, but because he had actually _wanted_ to.

“I think I’ve always trusted you to some extent. You’ve always treated me the same. You have been a rare constant in my life, whether I wanted you there at the time or not. I know that I can come to you if I need to.” He said honestly.

Severus knew he was right. Even without the last 24 hours between them, in which Severus had learned and realized more than he knew, he knew he would always do what he could for Harry.

“So you do have a usable brain after all,” Severus said, smirking to show he was being sarcastic instead of rude. He wanted to get back to the topic they’d been discussing. “I have to ask, Harry. What do you intend to do now that you know who your child’s other father is?”

Harry just shrugged, which irked Severus. He bit back a retort.

“I suppose I’ll tell him. I can’t really send him the news with an owl, so I’ll meet with him. Tell him about the baby and see what he wants to do about it. Not much else I can do, is there?” Harry asked.

Severus was instantly on edge. He had an awful feeling about this, and if the man was as bad as his reputation, he couldn’t let Harry meet the man alone. Merlin only knew how Anderson would react to a bastard child.

“Harry, please take someone with you. Don’t meet him alone. You have to think for yourself and the baby now, you can’t just go rushing into danger anymore.”

Harry chuckled. “Danger, Severus? I’m not going to slay a basilisk. I’m just going to tell him he’s having a child. That’s good news for most people.”

Severus pinned him with a look, and he sobered. “Severus?”

“He’s not a good man, Harry. If you absolutely insist, meet him in a public area. Take someone with you, if you can. Be careful. Now that we’ve proven you have a working brain in your head instead of air, I expect you to use it. You know better than anyone the kind of people there are out there.” Severus told him, barely keeping himself from begging. He didn’t think for a second Harry was taking him seriously. But Severus’ instinct told him this was a bad idea. However, he could no more force Harry to listen now than he could as a student.

Harry jammed his hands in his pocket and looked at Severus, touched by his concern. “Okay,” he conceded. “I’ll get Hermione to go, or Draco if she’s too busy. If they can’t though, I have to go alone. They’re all I’ve got, and this can’t wait. I’m almost 14 weeks in, Severus.”

Severus could hear the sadness in Harry’s tone at the mention of Hermione and Draco being all he had. Severus himself felt anger on Harry’s behalf. This man had saved the entire wizarding world when he was no more than a child, and everyone had still turned against him at the drop of a pin.

Maybe Harry was right. Maybe Anderson wouldn’t react the way Severus thought he would. If Severus got the same news, he would certainly be…..pleased. Perhaps hearing that he was having an heir would soften him up. Severus didn’t believe that for a second, and he was not one to give just anyone the benefit of the doubt, by any means. However, Harry had agreed to take someone with him and that was all Severus could ask of the man.

Severus nodded at him and stood from the couch. Harry was both disappointed and relieved at the loss of closeness, so he stood up as well. Now that the stress of finding out who his child’s father was was over, he didn’t know what to do. He should leave and send off an owl to ask Michael to meet with him but there was a feeling nagging at him that there was something unfinished here.

When the silence went on too long, Harry decided to just go. “I’ll uh, just be off then. I need to send out an owl, and see Madam Pomfrey.” He walked to the door and turned back to Severus, who was still standing by the sofa. “I’ll see you around?” he asked on a whim, and then mentally groaned. _I’ll see you around?_ How lame was that?

Severus raised an eyebrow in surprise. Harry almost sounded _hopeful._ “If you wish.”

Harry smiled and left. He stood by Severus’ door for a moment, trying to determine what Severus meant. If you wish? Severus was actually _willing_ to see him again? Harry sighed and headed toward the hospital wing. He needed to see Madam Pomfrey and send off an owl before he could go home. He would think about Severus later.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

The next evening found Harry back at his home in Godric’s Hollow, sitting again at the small desk in his room. He was frowning at the short note he had just got from a rather vicious owl. He put his knuckle in his mouth, bleeding from where the bird had bitten him, and read the note again.

It was written on the back of an expensive looking business card and addressed to no one.

                   Saturday the 8th at 12:15 p.m.

                   1618 Visser Alley

                   Don’t be late.

Well, thankfully tomorrow was Saturday. At least Harry wouldn’t have a lot of time to stress out about what to say. Already he was rehearsing in his head how it would be best to break the news to a stranger that they were having a baby.

Harry got into bed thinking about his upcoming meeting with his child’s father, praying he wouldn’t make a complete fool of himself. There was one question that followed Harry into sleep – if Michael Anderson was married as Severus had said, what was he doing in a gay club?

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Frantically throwing floo powder into his fireplace, Harry stepped in and called the password out to Hermione’s house. Bounding out on the other side and taking only a moment to recover his balance, he called out for his friend.

“Hermione? Draco?” he added when he got no response. He walked to the kitchen and found Draco at the small breakfast table they had there, eating a sandwich.

Draco looked at Harry, questioning.

“Is Hermione here?” Harry asked him, not bothering with ‘hello’s’ or the playful banter that had become almost routine for the two men.

Draco shook his head slowly, one eyebrow raised. “No, she’s gone to her parents for the day. You can wait here for her though, I’m sure I – “

Harry cut off whatever comment he was about to make with a hand. “I don’t have time to wait. I need you to come with me. Please.” He tacked on at the end.

The blond rolled his eyes. “Oh sure. Let me drop everything. I didn’t have any plans. Where is it that you can’t go alone, Potter?”

Harry ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “I’ve got to meet with Michael Anderson, the baby’s _other_ father, in 15 minutes, and I completely forgot I need to take someone with me.”

Draco’s forehead creased. Now his curiosity was piqued. “Why do you ‘need’ to have someone with you?”

Harry dropped his gaze. “Well, er, Snape asked me not to go alone. Said the guy isn’t a nice man, so I promised I wouldn’t go alone. I have to go now though or I’m going to be late. Will you come with me?” he asked while glancing at his watch for what he was sure was the hundredth time that morning.

Harry let out a sigh of relief when Draco banished his saucer to the sink and stood up. “Okay. Yes, I'll go. Where are you supposed to meet?” he ushered Harry back towards the floo as he spoke.

Harry took the note from his back pocket and gave it to Draco who glanced at it quickly before handing it back.

“I know the place. It will be quicker for us to apparate, than to floo over and walk.” Draco extended his arm to Harry, who nodded and took the offered arm. They disappeared with a crack.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Harry landed hard on his feet and opened his eyes to look around the street he was now standing on. They were surrounded on both sides by tall, important looking brick buildings. He didn’t recognize the area but assumed it must have been a wizarding district because they hadn’t apparated into a secluded spot, and the handful of people walking in and out of the surrounding buildings didn’t pay them any mind.

Draco moved beside him. “It’s this way, Potter.” He said, beginning to make his way across the street. Harry swallowed down the fresh wave of nervousness threatening to wash over him and followed Draco. The two men were silent until Draco stopped them in front of a brown building that looked much like all the others. ‘Law Offices of ANDERSON and BRAUN’ was visible across the glass front doors in large white letters.

Peering through the glass Harry could see what looked to be a waiting lounge, done entirely in black and white. Beyond the scattered couches and end tables there stood a reception desk occupied by a stern looking witch who quite reminded Harry of Professor McGonagall. There were various folders and parchments laying on the desk, along with a pot of ink and a couple of quills.

Draco cleared his throat and Harry looked over at him. “Well, are we going in, or are you going to stand there gawking all day?”

Harry smiled weakly and pushed the doors open. “Right. Going in,” he said and held the door behind him for Draco to follow.

As soon as the doors closed with a quiet _snick_ behind them the receptionist looked up from the parchment she was writing on. “What can I help you gentlemen with today?” she asked, in a tone that completely broke down her McGonagall-like aura. The plaque on her desk identified her as Simone Decker.

“Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy, here to see Mr Anderson. He is expecting us.” Draco answered for them.

Simone scratched out a short note on a small piece of parchment and sent it sailing through the back of the building and out of sight around the corner. “Please have a seat. Mr Anderson will be with you shortly.” She told them before going back to her work.

Harry and Draco hadn’t sat down for two minutes before they could hear the clicking of heavy boots on the tile floor, and they both turned to watch the man approaching them.

Michael Anderson was a tall, well-built man. He had a square, clean-shaven face, dark brown hair cut short, hazel eyes, and lightly tanned skin. He was impeccably dressed in an obviously expensive dark blue suit and tie and was overall a handsome man – if not for the scowl spread across his face.

Harry immediately felt apprehensive. This couldn’t be his child’s other parent. He didn’t remember ever meeting this guy, and definitely not having sex with him. He thought for a second and decided to give the man the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps he was using a glamour? That would be understandable, especially if the larger wizarding world – not to mention his wife – didn’t know he was gay. He would allow the man a chance to explain and then figure out what to do. Hopefully.

Anderson reached them and quite noticeably gave them both a once-over before settling his gaze on Harry. “Mr Potter, Mr Malfoy. Follow me to my office.” He said before turning on his heel and leading them all back the way he came. Harry smiled at the receptionist as they passed, who nodded back at him in return.

Upon reaching the man's office, Anderson offered them chairs in front of his desk, while he sat behind it. He steepled his fingers together and looked at Harry.

“I don’t have time for pleasantries. You requested to meet with me, what is it you wish to discuss?” he demanded. Harry saw Draco stiffen in his seat. Merlin, but this man was rude!

Harry took a deep breath and gathered his courage, deciding to just get to the point. “I’m pregnant, Mr Anderson. I’m here because you are my baby’s other father. But I don’t remember meeting you or…” he trailed off as his cheeks grew warm.

Anderson stared fixedly at Harry for several long minutes before speaking. “How far along are you, Mr Potter?”

Harry paused. That was not the question he was expecting Anderson to start with. “I just got to fourteen weeks, yesterday. But what does that have to do with me not remembering you?”

“And do you have proof that I am the baby’s other father?” he ignored Harry’s question.

“Yes, but- “

“Let me see it.”

Harry glared at Anderson and then stood up to pull the parchment with the results of the potion on it out of his back pocket. He thrust it towards the man across the desk and sat back down. “The results from the potion that was brewed for me by Potions Master Severus Snape. Now will you please tell me why I don’t remember you?” he grit out.

He didn’t fail to notice the look of disgust on the man’s face at the mention of Severus’ name and thought that, even when they came to an agreement over visitation, he would probably never be overly fond of Anderson.

After reading through the results and casting several spells on the parchment, Anderson duplicated the page with his wand and handed the original back to Harry. He put the copy in his desk drawer before pulling out two official-looking documents and putting them on top of the desk.

He produced two quills and handed them over to Draco and Harry. “If we are to continue this conversation, I am going to have to ask you to sign a non-disclosure agreement.”

Draco spoke up then, sounding rather shocked. “Excuse me? You want us to sign an NDA to discuss _your_ child?”

Anderson nodded. “To ensure the protection of my privacy. It is legally binding, and it states that if anything we discuss from here on out makes it into the press, you will be held responsible and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. You will be subjected to a 500,000 galleon fine, and possible time in Azkaban.”

Draco picked up one of the parchments the contract was on and looked it over, clearly searching for something. When he was finished, he put it back on the desk. “This doesn’t state that it’s magically binding.” He said with a self-satisfied smirk on his face, as though he knew something Anderson didn’t.

The man across the desk glared at him. “That’s because it’s not.” He grumbled petulantly.

At that confession, Draco turned to Harry and nodded once before signing the contract in front of him. When Harry had signed his and Anderson put the quills away, he again duplicated the contracts and handed a copy to Harry and Draco each.

“Mr Potter, you don’t remember me because I was under a glamour every time we met. While my wife knows of my preferences, the rest of the wizarding world does not. Hence the non-disclosure agreement. It would be…harmful to my reputation as well as my career if my business partner was made aware.” Anderson scowled the entire time he spoke.

Harry had latched on to one part of the explanation though. “ _Every_ time we met? Have we met more than once?”

A nod from Anderson. “And you, uhm, slept with me more than once?” Harry asked, trying to ignore the heat he could feel warming his cheeks.

Another nod. Harry was becoming inexplicably irritated. “Were you _trying_ to get me pregnant, then?”

Anderson hesitated before answering, and a sneer appeared on his face before he spoke. “No. The world doesn’t revolve around you anymore, Mr Potter. Now, is that all? I have work to do.”

_No._ Harry actually had more questions now than he did before. But the man was obviously hostile, and he just wasn’t up for a confrontation, especially not with Draco there. Harry stood to leave, prompting Draco to stand as well, and gave one last look to Anderson. “I came to ask if you want visitation or anything to do with the child. You can owl me if you do.”

And with that, Draco ushered Harry through the door with a muttered “tosser” and the two left.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

That evening, two wizards stood in a dark alley, wrapped in thick winter cloaks to combat the chill of the night. A piece of parchment exchanged hands.

“He’s pregnant.” The first man reported. “Confirmed earlier today.”

The second, shorter man chuckled. “I must admit, I was losing confidence.” He handed the parchment back and pulled out his wand. “You will receive your second deposit tomorrow, as well as further instructions.”

Giving a nod of acknowledgement, the first wizard disappeared with a crack, with the second following immediately after.

 

 

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part 2: Tea

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Harry stood in front of the mirror in his bedroom, trying to button his jeans over his growing stomach. At four months along, this was not an easy feat. Swearing, he gave up and pulled a pair of joggers from the wardrobe and yanked them on. He was going to go to Hermione’s today to speak with Draco about nutrient potions. Sparing one last glance at his reflection, he went downstairs and floo’ed to Hermione’s.

Upon stepping out of the green flames though, Harry was overcome with dizziness. He couldn’t seem to get the room to stand still, and his vision was yellow and hazy. He faintly heard Hermione call his name, and then his vision went black and he fell to the floor with a heavy thud.

When Harry next awoke, it was to Madam Pomfrey’s voice calling him.

“Harry, I need you to sit up and take this for me.” She said calmly.

He opened his eyes and groaned when he saw the potions phial she was holding out to him.

“What’s this?” he questioned, voice coming out harsher than he had intended.

She handed him the phial. “A nutrient potion. The scan I did when Hermione brought you in found there was no trace in your system, among other things. Harry, if you want to have any chance of having a healthy baby, you have to take these at least every twenty-four hours.” She admonished.

“Sorry,” Harry said, looking down at his hands. “I forgot. Is that why I passed out? I was fine before I floo’ed to Hermione’s, just a bit tired. I haven’t been getting a lot of sleep lately.”

Pomfrey looked at Harry with a sympathetic expression. “Your magic is going to be a bit off from here until after the baby is born. Portkeys and broomsticks are off limits, and you should only floo or apparate if someone is with you. You’re sixteen weeks now, and you should expect to deliver at the end of April. The next few months you should be focusing on gaining weight and keeping yourself calm – away from stressful situations. And nothing too draining on your magic, no heavy spells, and no extensive labour. If you are tired, sleep. If you are hungry, get yourself something to eat. Stay hydrated. As long as you pay attention to your body, you should be able to avoid having more of these episodes.

“Now, as far as your sleeping, I can speak with Professor Snape to see if there is something that can be modified for you if you would like. Just remember the nutrient potions are just as important. I will work up a meal plan for you as well.”

Pomfrey started to leave but noticed Harry moving to get up. “Ah ah. Make yourself comfortable, Mr Potter. You’ll be staying here overnight for observation.”

Harry flopped back on the bed dejectedly and threw an arm over his eyes. Well, this was just _great._

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Harry waited as long as he could possibly stand it before he got out of bed and crept past Madam Pomfrey’s office at the front of the infirmary. He cast a _tempus_ when he got down the corridor. 12:16 am.

For a while, Harry wandered about the castle, stopping every once in a while to speak to a portrait that happened to be awake at the late hour. He ran into Professor Flitwick on the 6th floor, but the two men merely smiled and nodded at each other before continuing their separate ways.

Before long, Harry found himself at the great front doors. As cold as it was outside, he couldn’t resist the temptation of the fresh air a walk around the grounds would give him.

He made his way along the various footpaths leisurely, admiring the first place he had called home. He walked through the quidditch pitch where he had played hundreds of games and had eventually become team captain. The stands, where the school had watched him and three others battle dragons for the golden eggs during his fourth year; then later, keeping watch while they made their way through the deadly maze.

This brought the memory of the last moments and the dead body of Cedric. The pain of watching yet another person die that he was too late to save. The horror of watching helplessly as Voldemort was resurrected right before his eyes. The desperation he’d felt battling the sadistic wizard and seeing his parents ghosts. And then, portkeying back to the school, Cedric’s body in his grip. Harry didn’t think he’d ever seen such anguish from anyone as he did that night When Diggory Sr. saw his murdered son.

Harry closed his eyes against the onslaught of emotions that was a hairsbreadth away from taking over him. Rubbing his hands over his face and renewing the warming charm he’d cast over himself, he walked back the way he came.

He came to the Black Lake and saw the giant squid floating lazily across the surface, waving a tentacle every few moments. Harry found a spot as close to the edge as he could get and sat atop a large rock. He sat there for a good while, lost in his thoughts and mesmerized by the calmness of the grounds.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Severus made his way out to the Black Lake as he did nearly every night. Even with all the years that had passed since the war, sleep never came easy for him. He was always able to clear his head at the lake while watching the various creatures in and around it, mainly the giant squid.

Tonight, however, someone was already there. He stopped walking and squinted in the dark, trying to make out who it was. He could tell it was a man and so likely another teacher, he told himself. He contemplated turning around and going up to the astronomy tower instead, but something stopped him.

He walked the rest of the way down to the person sitting on the rock and reached a hand out to touch his shoulder. He started to ask what he was doing out on the grounds so late, but he barely got one syllable out before the man jumped up, whipped his wand out, and promptly tripped – falling right into the Black Lake. Before he was completely submerged, Severus took note of the glasses on the man's face and abruptly realized who it was.

_Damn._ Harry Potter had just fallen into the lake. Severus shrugged out of his cloak as quickly as possible, and Harry broke through the surface, spitting out water while simultaneously gasping for air. Severus leant over and held his hand out to help Harry from the water, and wrapped him in his discarded cloak when he was on his feet.

“What did you go and do that for?” Harry grit out at him through chattering teeth.

Severus’ eyebrows climbed up his forehead. “Me? I was only asking what you were doing out here so late. You fell into the lake all by yourself.” He argued. How was he to know that Potter would react so badly? He pulled his wand from his sleeve and cast a drying charm over Harry’s clothing and a warming charm over his body before placing a hand on his back and pushing him in the direction of the school. “You should get inside. Late night swims are not good for you, or the child you are carrying.”

Harry rolled his eyes but refrained from protesting as he started walking. He was cold, and warming charms only did so much. He didn’t realize Snape was walking beside him until the man spoke again.

“What are you doing out here so late? I wasn’t even aware you were in the school.”

“I fainted, and Madam Pomfrey insisted I stay overnight. I couldn’t stand another minute in that bed, so I took a walk.”

Severus smiled faintly. He knew how Poppy was when it came to her patients, and he knew she wouldn’t be pleased when she realized Potter was no longer where he should be. Severus voiced his curiosity as to why Potter had fainted at all.

“Madam Pomfrey says it’s got something to do with my magic being off until after the baby gets here. That, and I’m supposed to be eating more.” Harry's tone told Severus he was unconvinced.

Severus, on the other hand, agreed with Poppy. The man had always been far too small, and now was not the time to be skimping on the food.

“You should listen to her. She’s a very knowledgeable mediwitch. I have to say I agree with her. Are you taking the nutrient potions as we discussed?”

Harry hesitated and hung his head, which told Severus everything he needed to know.

“Harry, those are the best thing you can do for your child right now. You want a healthy baby, don’t you?” he inquired.

“Yes, I want a healthy baby. Of course, I do. It’s just… I just…” Harry trailed off, sighing.

Severus didn’t think Harry knew how to finish his sentence, but he was oddly willing to listen to the man’s problems. And they were nearly at the front doors now. “Would you care to join me for tea? If you’re not tired from your swim, that is.”

Harry stopped walking and turned to Severus, a curious expression flitting across his face. “Sure. Yeah. I think I’d like that.” He said quietly.

 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Severus placed his hand on the door to his chambers and held it open for Harry to enter. He closed it behind him and went into his kitchen to start their tea. He could have Chessie get it for them, but sometimes he preferred to do it himself.

Harry sat on his sofa and looked into the fire that Chessie kept burning for the potions master during the colder months of the year.

When Severus returned to the living room with their tea, Harry took his cup and thanked the man.

“You’re welcome,” Severus answered. He sat there a few moments, searching his mind for a suitable topic. He had never been any good at small talk and usually did everything to avoid it.

Harry saved him the trouble and spoke first. “So, why were _you_ outside? Aren't there classes tomorrow?”

Severus gave him a funny look. “No. As tomorrow is Sunday, there are no classes.”

Harry chuckled awkwardly. “Oh. Right.”

It was silent for a moment when a thought struck Severus. “Have you spoken with the other father yet?”

Harry scoffed and rested his head on the back of the sofa. “Yes.” Was all he said.

“And…?”

Frustration clouded Harry’s features and he sat up again. “As much as I hate to admit it, you were right. He’s not a nice man. He was rude and uncooperative. He made me sign a non-disclosure agreement before he would even talk to me. I didn’t know, but he says we met more than once and that he was using Polyjuice Potion.”

An NDA? “He made you sign an NDA?”

Harry nodded.

Severus groaned. “I sincerely hope you read the entire document. Non-disclosure agreements are legal, if not magically binding. Did you?”

“Er, no. But- “

“No!? You didn’t read the entire agreement? Potter, anything, ANYTHING could have been in that agreement and by signing, you have to abide by it! Do you have a copy of it?” Severus demanded. He probably had no right, in fact, he _knew_ he had no right, but Potter clearly had no idea what he had gotten himself into. He knew he should have gone with the man. Anderson was as manipulative as they come.

“I have the copy at home.” Harry was confused that Severus seemed so angry at him. “Draco read it.” He told the man. “He said it was okay to sign. He sorta reacted like you did, actually. But Anderson said we needed to before he could tell us anything.”

“Draco went with you?” Severus couldn’t hide his relief. His godson had a good head on his shoulders and knew plenty about the legalities of an NDA.

“Yes. Hermione was busy.”

Severus took a long drink of his tea while he considered the information. He supposed that with Anderson being a lawyer, an NDA wasn’t that far-fetched. He would still ask Harry to see the copy of it later though, to make sure Draco hadn’t missed anything. “So, what did he say when you told him you are pregnant?”

Harry gave a half shrug. “He asked if I had proof he was the father, made a copy of the results you gave me, and asked if that was all. I don’t really expect to hear from him again. He didn’t seem interested in seeing the baby at all. Maybe he’ll change his mind once he’s had some time.”

“Are you hoping he _will_ change his mind?” Severus prodded. He didn’t know why he wanted to know, but he did.

“Sorta, yeah. I don’t think I can do this by myself.” He held a hand up to stop the protest forming on Severus’ lips. “I know, I have Hermione and Draco, and they’re great, but it’s not the same. They won’t be living with me, sharing the load.”

_‘I’ll help’_ Severus nearly blurted. He bit his tongue. What was he thinking? He and Harry hardly had the best past. In fact, he could probably count on two hands how many civil conversations the two of them had held. He didn’t know where this newfound curiosity had come from. He felt drawn to Harry more than ever before.

_Because you’ve always wanted a child of your own. A family._ His conscience whispered to him before Severus could squash the thoughts down.

He couldn’t deny it, though. Contrary to what the rest of the world believed, he HAD wanted a child of his own at some point. A partner in life to come home to, maybe somewhere that wasn’t a dungeon. Severus prided himself on never wanting for more than he knew he would get. He never even asked for it.

But here Harry was, getting what Severus himself had always wanted.

Unconditional love.

Severus swallowed his jealousy to answer Harry. “You could hire a house elf or a nanny. I’m sure you could find someone qualified that is willing to help. A lot of wizarding families have nannies, most of them live-in.”

Yeah, Harry thought. That’s just what he needed. Someone else prying into his life and giving everything to the press, and using his baby to do it.

“No. I don’t want anyone near my child that doesn’t have to be. I remember how it is, having the press print every single detail of your life for the entire wizarding world to see. I don’t want my kid to have to deal with that.” He paused. “Would you do it?”

“Yes.” He answered before he’d fully considered the ramifications of the question, something he never did.

Harry cocked his head and thought about that. Severus Snape, hiring a nanny for his child. He couldn’t imagine Severus as a father, much less hiring someone to help him. But then, Harry thought about it and decided he _could_ picture it. Snape was a different person now that he didn’t have Tom Riddle hanging over him. Harry thought he might make a good father, in fact.

At the same time, Severus was thinking about what he had just agreed to. He supposed he would have to inform Minerva of his resignation tomorrow. He smiled to himself at the thought of her expression when he explained why, exactly, he was resigning. He would probably have to find somewhere to live near Harry unless Harry wanted a live-in nanny. It wasn’t his own family, but the more he thought about it, the more he thought he could be happy with this. And then Harry unknowingly shattered the dream.

“So, then who would you hire?”

It took Severus only seconds to realize he had misunderstood Harry’s question. The crushing disappointment that flooded him was a little more confusing, so he ignored it. For now.

“Probably someone older. More experienced. Someone I could trust. I would definitely find someone before the baby gets here if you do go down that route. It will be easier to have established a relationship prior to the baby’s arrival, then to have to deal with that on top of what I am assured, is the very hard job of caring for a newborn.”

“Hmmm. I suppose you are right.” Harry agreed. Maybe he would ask Hermione what she thought about it. She would probably have some suggestions.

Snape interrupted his thoughts. “Harry, why do you think you can’t do this alone?”

Harry sighed. He’d been thinking about this by the Black Lake, and he had arrived at a conclusion. “Well, I don’t have any role models, have I? I know what not to do, but I don’t know what _to_ do. My aunt and uncle were awful, and I’m realizing now they didn’t do Dudley any favours either. Mum and Dad didn’t make it very far, so I can’t ask them. Hermione and Draco haven’t got any kids, so no luck there either.”

“Harry,” Severus stopped him. “You know what not to do. That’s more than some people can say. I’ve never seen you fail anything that you truly put your mind to, and I don’t believe you’ll fail this either. Eleven years and there will be another Potter walking these halls, and I’m sure they’ll turn out just as well as you did.”

He laughed outright at that. “I turned out alright? Professor, I think that’s the greatest compliment you’ve ever given me.” He smiled at Severus.

“I told you, you can call me Severus. I’m no longer your professor.”

Harry looked at the man and nodded.  “Are you finished with your tea?”

“Yes.”

Harry stood up and collected their cups to return them to the kitchen. After placing them in the sink, he turned back to Severus. The man was staring into the fire, lost in whatever he was thinking of, and Harry took the opportunity to really look at the man.

Severus Snape. The man who had made Harry’s life a living hell, only to turn out an ally and one of the main reasons the light had won the war at all. Looking at him, Harry realized the kind of person Snape truly was, was not the person he allowed other people to see.

He hadn’t forgotten the concern on the man’s face outside when he was casting charms over Harry. Nor had he forgotten that if it weren’t for Severus, he probably would have made a mistake and terminated his pregnancy.

Here, in his chambers, the man was relaxed. He was still sarcastic, but it wasn’t as cruel as it used to be. He wasn’t the cynical, pessimistic, hateful man he was before the war ended. He was human. Harry didn’t think he would ever be one to openly discuss his feelings, or make grand gestures of friendship or love, but Harry didn’t care about that. It had dawned on him that he wanted to know this man, this Severus.

He walked to the living room and stood behind the couch, hands on the back. “I should go back to the hospital wing. I’m sure Madam Pomfrey is going to be pretty angry with me as it is. But, uhm. Would you like to do this again? Have tea, I mean. Or coffee. Or lunch, if you want that instead, I could..” he trailed off at Severus’ smirk.

“You are rambling, Harry. Yes, I would be willing to have tea again. Lunch would be acceptable as well.” He added. A broad smile lit up Harry’s face. Severus decided he wanted to see a smile, that smile, directed at him more often.

He got up to walk the man to the door as Harry told him he would owl him to set it up.

Harry crossed the threshold before turning back. “Goodnight, Severus. And thank you, for the tea.”

Severus inclined his head and stepped back, shutting the door.

“Goodnight, Harry.”

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thought I should add - I'm taking an 18-hour road trip this weekend to go to my nephew's dedication, so the next chapter might be a bit late as well.
> 
> Edited 3/26/19 for mistakes.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for taking so long for updating. Life in my house is chaos right now. All in the last couple of weeks I have had to help coordinate my brother moving - driving - from Alaska to Idaho (me) and then California. My baby nephew had surgery and is now in a cast so caring for him is 100x harder and my days are insane between him and my other two nieces. I've been trying to get this out here and there but between this and my medication changes and my therapy, my writer's block has been bad. So hopefully, this chapter makes up for it!
> 
> *****On hiatus after this chapter until June*****

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part 1: Boy or Girl?

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

A week and a half had gone by since Harry had fainted in Hermione’s living room. Madam Pomfrey had asked him to come by the infirmary this weekend to follow up and check on the baby. She had supplied him with a meal plans well as several weeks’ worth of potions to help relieve the relentless nausea he had been experiencing. Harry felt better today than he had since he found out he was pregnant.

Sunday morning, Harry had made the trip from Godric’s Hollow to Hogwarts and was winding his way through the corridors of the school towards the infirmary. There were a fair amount of students wandering around enjoying their weekend, but Harry paid them no mind, lost in his thoughts.

That is until his name caught his attention. Harry slowed his steps and noticed more than one student pointing at him, and several whispering behind their hands.

“Look, it’s Harry Potter…”

“That’s Harry Potter. My mum said he’s a faggot…”

“I read he sleeps with 5 guys a night…”

“Father says it’s a sickness…”

He whirled around, intending to tell them exactly where they could go when a voice stopped him in his tracks.

“Mr Evans. Detention with Mr Hunsworth for your language. If anyone would like to join him, speak up.” Snape said, striding up the corridor and coming to a stop slightly in front of Harry. The boy Harry assumed to be Evans opened his mouth to say something, but a glare from Severus silenced him. A raised eyebrow from him and the students fled the opposite direction.

Harry looked at the man. Severus was in his usual teaching attire, all black and buttons and sweeping robes.

Snape turned to him. “Harry. I would have thought you were done stirring up trouble along these halls.” He mused. Harry was gaping at him as though he’d never seen him before.

It took Harry several moments to realize Severus was actually _joking_ with him, and several more to form a response. “I don’t stir up trouble. Okay, anymore.” He added at Severus’ amused smirk.

“Of course not, Mr Potter.  I assume you are here to see Poppy?” Snape asked him.

He nodded and turned to continue on to the hospital wing. He was mildly surprised when he heard Severus walking along with him. “Yes. She wants a checkup done every couple weeks.” He sighed. He knew monitoring the baby was necessary, but with him only being able to apparate and floo with an escort – well, it was inconvenient, to say the least. He also had to admit that upon realizing Michael probably wanted nothing to do with the pregnancy or baby, he’d been feeling a sense of… loss. This was not how he had ever imagined having children, and not only because he didn’t think he’d be the one pregnant. He had imagined having a partner, someone to share everything with. The pregnancy, the birth, the raising and responsibilities. But here he was, doing it alone.

He and Severus had reached the doors to the infirmary and Severus held the door open for him. He turned to look at the man.

“Do you want to come with me? Madam Pomfrey thinks she’ll be able to tell me what the gender of the baby is today.” He asked.

What the hell? Harry had opened his mouth to thank the man for walking with him, not make himself look like a desperate fool.

Once again, Severus was speechless. Harry had just invited him to witness one of the biggest milestones in his pregnancy. He wanted to, oh how he wanted to. But he should really be preparing for tomorrow’s classes. Severus would have to turn him down.

“I suppose I could go with you for… moral support, if you wish.” He offered. Well, so much for turning him down.

A smile stretched across Harry’s face. He looked happy. Far happier than Severus thought the situation warranted, but he couldn’t deny Harry had a beautiful smile. The man had perfectly straight white teeth, pink rosy lips that were now slightly parted, and a happiness that reached his eyes. Severus didn’t think he deserved that smile, but he was a selfish man.

“Great!” Harry exclaimed and went through the doors. Severus followed at a slower pace, wondering at the man’s enthusiasm. Certainly, he wasn’t that excited just because Severus had agreed to sit with him for a check-up? Shaking his head Severus walked with him to the bed at the far end of the infirmary, where a gown was already waiting for Harry.

He stood on the opposite side of the curtain while Harry dressed, and then took the chair that was set aside the bed and closed the curtain behind him with a wave of his wand. After the debacle in the hall, he didn’t think Harry really wanted to be seen here now.

A moment passed and Madam Pomfrey came through the curtain.

Poppy looked up from Harry’s chart she was marking in when she noticed there was another person behind the curtains with them. “Harry. Are you ready?” she asked with a soft smile. Her eyes were flickering with curiosity, but she said nothing more.

“As I’ll ever be,” Harry said before untying one side of the gown and pushing it off of his abdomen so Madam Pomfrey could start with her examination. He knew Snape was looking at his naked stomach, but he was not ashamed of his body. Even pregnant he still had the same slim figure he’d had since he left school. He had once had a more toned body that came from playing Quidditch, but he hadn’t played a game since before the war ended.

When Severus had told Harry he would sit with him for this, he had not considered that Harry would be half naked. He had pants on, and the gown covered a portion of his chest, but everything else…

Severus raked his eyes over Harry’s body. The man had smooth bronze skin that made him wanted to run his hands over it to see if it felt as soft as it looked. He took in Harry’s swelling abdomen that was rising gently with every breath taken. Severus had to push away the urge to lay his hands on Harry’s belly to feel the baby rolling and kicking underneath his hands. He saw the thin trail of hair that disappeared into the top of Harry’s pants. His eyes moved lower, down over the slim thighs and firm calves and he wondered how they would feel wrapped around his waist.

Severus averted his eyes and shifted slightly in his seat. It wouldn’t do for Harry to catch Severus devouring him with his eyes.

Madam Pomfrey set Harry’s chart down on the bedside table and cast a cleaning charm on her hands before moving over to Harry’s side. She placed her hands on Harry’s stomach, pushing down slightly in different spots. She measured his belly with a conjured tape measure and smiled at him.

“Your baby is certainly growing. I’m pleased to see you have gained a bit of weight yourself, Harry. Are you still wanting to know if you are having a boy or a girl?” she asked.

Harry nodded quickly. “Yes.” He wanted to be as prepared for this baby as possible, and part of that meant knowing if he was going to be raising a little girl or a little boy.

“Very well. I’m going to cast a spell over you that will allow us to see the baby in the third dimension. Now, it is easy enough to manipulate this form babies don’t always cooperate. They may have their legs crossed, or the umbilical cord could be in the way.” Poppy informed him as she pulled her wand from her robes.

Harry took a deep breath to prepare himself. He was going to actually see his baby. Excitement and fear fought for dominance inside him.

Poppy spoke an incantation and a sharp, crystal clear image appeared and hovered just over his exposed stomach. Harry heard Severus inhale sharply, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away in order to look over at the man.

Harry watched as Poppy prodded the image into turning and Harry could see that it was indeed the third dimension. He could see every angle of the baby.

 _His baby_.

Madam Pomfrey looked at the image for so long Harry nearly asked her if something was wrong. Before he could though, she nodded to herself and smiled at him. “Congratulations, Mr Potter. You are having a little girl.”

A hundred thoughts exploded in Harry’s brain at her words.

He was having a baby girl. He wondered if she would look more like him or more like Michael. For her sake, he prayed to Merlin that she wouldn’t inherit his bad hair and poor eyesight.

Harry closed his eyes and thought of all the possibilities, all of the things he would get to teach his daughter. He vowed to himself that he would keep her safe and make sure she knew how much she was loved.

He would not fail her.

Severus cleared his throat and Harry opened his eyes to look at the man. He had an expression on his face that looked suspiciously like joy and Harry smiled at him.

The corner of Severus’ mouth lifted in an attempt at a smile before he could stop it. Harry look so thrilled it radiated off of him and made him even more attractive. It was almost too much to look at.

Severus himself was thanking any god who was listening that Harry had decided against terminating the pregnancy. The man so very rarely had anything to be happy about he was happy that Harry had at least this.

He inclined his head towards him. “Congratulations, Harry.” He offered. He watched as Madam Pomfrey ended the viewing spell and pulled Harry’s gown back over him.

Hiding his slight disappointment at the loss of the sight of Harry’s bare skin, he stood up and brushed off his robes. “I will leave you to it, Poppy.” Before he pulled back the curtain to leave, he added: “I will be seeing you for lunch, Harry.”

Madam Pomfrey didn’t hide her surprise at this and looked at Harry for any sort of explanation. He shook his head at her and smiled, and she reluctantly let it go.

 

 

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part 2: Lunch

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

  

Severus swept up the stairs to the headmistresses office and knocked when he reached the top.

“Enter!”

He opened the door and walked determinedly over to the large mahogany desk the headmistress was sitting behind. “Minerva.” He said in greeting.

She sat back in her chair. “Severus. What can I do for you?” she questioned. He rarely came up for social visits, and she doubted that’s why he was here now.

He quirked a brow. Always to the point, Minerva was. It was one of the things he liked about her. Albus had always loved to speak in riddles and seemingly took great pleasure in beating around the bush and more often than not he left Severus with more questions than answers.

“This weekend is the last Hogsmeade weekend before the students leave for winter break.” He began. “I have been coerced into chaperoning yet again.”

Minerva pinched the bridge of her nose. “I am aware, Severus. I am the one who ‘coerced’ you. And as I recall, there wasn’t much coercing to be had.”

Severus mumbled something under his breath that she couldn’t quite make out, but she let it go and waited for him to speak.

He sighed. “I would like to ask for you to find another teacher to take my place.” He stopped there, not wanting to give away any more than he had to.

“Severus, just because you don’t enjoy taking the students down to the village, does not mean that- “

“I have a lunch date.” He cut her off. “Well, not a date per se, but I am meeting someone and I can't very well do that if I'm to be supervising a school full of heathens.”

Minerva stopped herself from reprimanding him for his choice of words; it would do no good. “It will hardly be a school full. First and second years aren’t allowed to go.”

He waited.

“Very well. I will ask Septima.”

“Thank you. I won't take up any more of your time. Good day, Minnie.”

Minerva smiled at Severus’ nickname for her. He had begun using it a few years into his position as Slytherin Head of House, but only when they were completely alone. She didn’t particularly enjoy others shortening her name or calling her silly things like ‘Ma’am’ or using endearments like ‘sweetheart’. But she had had a soft spot for Severus since he was a child, so she let him get away with it.

She watched him leave her office and close the door behind him, and she picked up the spring Quidditch schedule shed been going over and went back to work.

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Harry stood at the stove in his kitchen, nervous beyond belief. Today was his lunch with Severus and he wanted it to go well. He had refused to let himself think about the man since his last visit with Poppy. About the way Severus had stepped in for him in the corridor and told those students off; about the way the man looked when Harry had asked Severus to join him for his checkup; about how he had felt Severus staring at him while he laid on the bed, half naked.

The more Harry interacted with Severus, the more Harry wanted to be around the man. There was something about him that relaxed Harry, a sense of sureness and security. He had been alone for so long jumping from bed to bed, never spending more than a night with someone. He hadn’t had anyone to be with, just for himself, since Ginny.

He stopped his train of thought right there. He did NOT want to think about Ginny. Or Ron. Or any of the Weasley’s and the last time he saw them.

Harry was pulling the last of their lunch – simple fish and chips – from the fryer when the wards alerted him to Severus coming through the floo. He took a breath to calm himself and called out to the man.

“In here, Severus. You’re right on time, I’m finishing up lunch now.” He called.

Harry yelped when Severus spoke from right behind him. “No need to shout, Potter. I can hear you loud and clear.” Severus assured him, breath ghosting across the back of Harry’s neck.  He saw the shudder the man tried to suppress and smirked.

Harry turned around to face Severus and found the man even closer than he had anticipated. Before he could make a fool of himself, he slid out from between him and the counter and crossed the kitchen to grab plates. He set them both down on the counter next to the fryer and served their food.

“What do you want to drink? Water, tea, something stronger?” he asked while he walked both of their plates over to the table and set them down. “I hope you don’t mind fish and chips, do you?”

Severus followed Harry and took the chair he was offered and shook his head. “Fish and chips are just fine and I’ll have water. I do have to go back to school this evening.”

Harry looked at Severus sharply with wide eyes, and Severus realized what he’d said. He fumbled to correct himself. “Not that I’m assuming I’ll be here that long. I’m sure you have other things to do than to sit around with your old teacher.” He cringed internally. He had never been so inarticulate in all of his life, and he _never_ backtracked. What was it about Harry that turned him into a bumbling fool?

The other man merely smiled at him, his face taking on a pleased look that made it hard for Severus to look away. “No, it’s okay. Stay as long as you like. I actually don’t have anything else to do.”

Severus watched him walk into the kitchen, his eyes greedily taking in the black t-shirt stretched across the muscles of Harry’s back. The man was by no means a strapping, muscular man and for this Severus was grateful. He had always preferred those with a smaller build and shorter than himself; Harry was both of those things while still having a hint of muscle. His gaze slipped lower, over Harry’s firm arse encased in his denim jeans, his calves and his bare feet.

His mouth went dry when Harry bent over to pull two bottles of water from the bottom shelf of the refrigerator and he looked away before he turned and caught Severus staring. “You seem to prefer muggle appliances to wizarding ones.” He said trying to make small talk and distract himself from the inappropriate thoughts he’d been having only a second ago.

Harry set a bottle of water down in front of him and shrugged as he sat down. “Yeah, I do. Got used to them living with my Aunt and Uncle, and it wasn’t too big a deal to get the house wired for electricity when I rebuilt it. Hermione helped me figure out how to get them to function with all the magic around.”

He sprinkled salt over his chips and popped one in his mouth, chewing slowly and watching for Severus’ reaction to his own food.

Severus put a piece of fish in his mouth and found himself shocked at how perfectly it was cooked. Given Harry’s history in potions, he wasn’t expecting him to be very good with cooking, as the two were so similar. Cleary, he had underestimated the man.

He looked at him across the table and found Harry already watching him. “This is really good, Harry. I have to admit to being impressed.”

Harry’s resulting smile was breathtaking. He thanked Severus and they ate the rest of their meal in relative silence. When they were done and Harry had put their dishes in the sink, he made tea and showed Severus to the living room, hoping the man would be able to stay a while before having to go back to Hogwarts.

“How is the school year going so far?” Harry spoke the first thing that came to mind in an effort to engage the man in conversation. He knew Severus would always have something to say about the children he taught potions too.

Severus took a sip of tea and crossed his legs, his ankle resting on the opposite knee, and balanced his cup on his leg. “It is no better now than it was when you were there. It appears I will be subjected to teaching imbeciles till the day that I die.” He complained. There were a handful of students he had come across while teaching that had a real interest or talent in potions but they were very few and very far between.

Harry nodded sympathetically. He could imagine how much Severus loathed teaching if his school days were anything to go by. “Have you ever given thought to resigning? With the war being over, you could do just about anything you wanted.” Harry told him.

Severus scoffed. “Oh? And how many people do you suppose would want a Death Eater working with them?” he challenged. “How many businesses do you truly believe would even _consider_ offering me a job?”

“EX! Ex-Death Eater.” Harry hissed out, immediately angry and clenching his fists. He had done his very best to ensure everyone knew damn good and well that the war would not have been won without the man sitting in front of him. “You were acquitted on all charges. Everyone knows how much you did to help us win the war and how much you had to sacrifice.”

“Maybe so, but that does not equivalate to people seeing anything other than the dark mark when they see me. I’ve accepted it, Harry. You should too.”

Harry ignored that. “What about starting your own business? Do something you actually like instead of working around someone else?” A plan started to form in his head, one he’d have to think long and hard about if he could even get Severus to think about quitting his teaching job. He would save it for later.

Severus thought for a moment, and Harry almost thought he was going to say yes right then and there, but no luck. “I could, but not any time soon. I have a contract that doesn’t end until the school year is over, and even then I would have to give Minerva time to find another teacher to fill my spot. It’s just not an option right now.” He told Harry.

The more he thought about it though, the more he thought Harry might be on to something. He had never considered working anywhere but Hogwarts, before the war because he was needed there and after the war, because he was and always would be seen as a Death Eater regardless of what Harry wanted, and therefore was unlikely to obtain any other job.

“Severus?” Harry's voice brought him out of his thoughts.

“Hmm?”

“I asked if you wanted to feel the baby move?” Harry repeated.

Severus hesitated for a moment. “You can already feel her moving? How far along are you now?” he asked, trying to buy himself time. He _wanted_ to feel the baby move, he wanted to touch Harry. He wanted it so much it scared him and he hated that.

Harry had laid both of his hands across his stomach and was smiling. “Eighteen weeks now. Madam Pomfrey says other people can feel her already because I’m too thin and there’s nowhere for her to go.”

“Maybe another time, okay?” Severus checked his watch, wanting to escape. The way Harry moved, how he spoke about the baby, the beautiful smile that was more often than not plastered across his face, Severus was becoming more attracted to him by the day. “I need to get back to the school.”

Harry visibly deflated.

“Oh, okay. I suppose I'll be seeing you around then?” Harry didn’t dare ask Severus for lunch again; not until he knew how the man felt about this one. Fortunately, Severus answered that for him as though he had read Harry’s mind.

Severus stood and set his cup on the coffee table. “This was pleasant. Perhaps if you're amenable we can have lunch again next weekend? Maybe at Hogwarts?” Severus wouldn’t admit how much he wanted Harry to say yes – not even to himself.

Harry obviously approved of his idea though, if the rapid nodding of his head was any indication. Severus couldn’t help but be pleased with his enthusiasm. Even if it was only because Harry had nothing better to do it made him feel somewhat important.

He saw Harry starting to stand to see him off and waved him back down. “Don’t trouble yourself. I know how to floo” he assured him with a smirk to show he was teasing.

Harry stood anyways. “I’m actually going to go upstairs and have a soak in a hot bath. Madam Pomfrey says I can't take any more than one pain potion a day, so it’s all I can do to relieve the back pain.”

Before Severus’ mind ran away with images and thoughts of Harry naked and wet in the bath, he bid the man goodbye and floo’ed back to his quarters.

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part 3: The Battle Begins

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

It was Friday night and Harry had just got comfortable in his bed after eating dinner (that was late by his standards) when the owl came. He grumbled as he got out of his warm bed and opened the window so that he could let the bird in. He quickly untied the letter from its leg that was smudged from the rain and was hit with a sense of excitement when he saw the writing on the front. It was from Michael. Instantly a thought came to his mind: Maybe he wanted to be involved with the baby after all?

He got back onto his bed and pulled the duvet up over his legs, leaning back against his headboard and held out the letter in front of him. It was rather thick, he thought, but then he remembered Michael was a lawyer, so this was more than likely a thorough custody agreement rather than just a flimsy little spoken agreement spoken between two parents. That didn’t bother Harry at all – when it came to this, he preferred everything to be clear between him and Anderson.

Harry tore open the envelope, pulled out the sheaf of papers inside, and began reading. There was a cover letter required to file the paperwork at the ministry and he skipped that. Harry didn’t understand most of the legal jargon, but knew that Hermione could help him figure it out later if he asked her to. He scanned through the documents, looking for the portion he was most interested in reading. It took several minutes but Harry finally found what he was looking for.

* * *

1\. Physical Custody

     a. Child’s residence

          i. Parent known as Michael Lewis Anderson shall have sole/joint/no physical custody of the child  7  days per week.

          ii. Parent known as Harry James Potter shall have sole/joint/no physical custody of the child  7  days per week.

2\. Visitation Schedule – Custom

     a. From birth to one year of age or until the child is weaned, the child will reside with the parent known as Harry James Potter.

     b. While the child is not in school, s/he will visit with Harry 1-2 times per week, for an hour each visit. These visits can be decided upon between Mr Anderson and Mr Potter when convenient.

     c. When the child reaches school age, s/he will visit with Harry for one (1) 24-hour period per school break, to be decided upon at Mr Anderson and Mr Potter’s convenience.

     d. Birthdays, holidays, family vacations and other events or activities that require extended visitation will be discussed with Mr Anderson.

3\. Legal Custody

     a. Parent known as Michael Lewis Anderson shall have sole/joint/no legal custody of the child.

     b. Parent known as Harry James Potter shall have sole/joint/no legal custody of the child.

4\. Child Maintenance

     a. Support in the amount of   250 galleons   will be deposited into Gringotts account number   620182562.01-13  .

     b. Child support will be paid to   Michael Lewis Anderson on the  3rd   of every month, starting  3 May 2004 .

* * *

Harry stopped reading, his vision blurred with angry tears. He didn’t understand what was going on here. Michael wanted to take full custody of the baby? He only wanted to let Harry see his daughter once or twice a week? This was outrageous. This was a joke…this had to be a joke, right?

He got out of bed, struggling to get a breath, and walked over to the hook he had by his bedroom door. He shrugged into his house robe and staggered down the stairs as the rubber band tightened around his lungs. Now it felt like someone was trying to squeeze the life from him and he knew all too well that he only had a minute – two at most – before his panicking caused him to pass out. Normally, he would try to calm himself. He would take a step back from the situation and see what he could fix.

But he couldn’t fix this. This, this _man,_ his child’s other father was trying to take her away! Was trying to make it so that he only saw her a few hours out of the whole year, and even less once she went to school. He should have listened to Severus, he should never have told Anderson that he was pregnant in the first place.

Harry made it to the fireplace just as his vision started to go black around the edges. He groped around for the floo powder on the mantle, threw some haphazardly into the glowing fire and called out the only place he could think of, all while hoping he wasn’t going to burn himself alive as he fell into the floo and succumbed to unconsciousness.

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Severus walked leisurely down to the dungeons from the great hall through a secret passage behind a tapestry in the first floor. He despised taking his meals with the rest of the student body, especially dinner when everyone is forced to attend, but Minerva made him a deal that he only had to be present for three a week and that was better than Albus had ever offered so he did it without complaint. He exits the passage into a corridor close by the door to his chambers, speaks the password after putting his hand on the door, and goes in.

Finally. The students will all be off tomorrow for the holiday. Severus has an entire four weeks with no classes to teach. Even better, he will be seeing Harry just two days from now on Sunday for their lunch.

He shrugs out of his teaching robe and hangs it on the hook by his door as he thinks about what they should have to eat. When he turns to make his way to the desk and get a head start on his grading, he stops in his tracks.

There, lying on the floor in a heap by his fireplace is Harry.

Severus registers several things about the situation at once. First, and by far most important, Harry is not moving. Secondly, even from his position several feet away, he can see the tear tracks down Harry’s face – though any tears were long dried up – that clearly point out that Harry had been upset when he floo’ed over. Was he attacked? He was in his night clothes though, so that didn’t make sense. Harry said he rarely went out of the house for anything – let alone by himself and at night.

In the seconds it took for Severus to process all these things he was already in action. He snapped his fingers to summon Chessie while he strode to Harry and knelt down next to the unconscious man. Chessie appeared with a muted ‘pop’.

“Chessie, please find and inform Madam Pomfrey that I need her assistance with an expectant patient of hers immediately. Bring her to me as soon as you are able.” He ordered the small elf as he put two fingers on one of Harry’s wrist, checking his heart rate.

It was only when he heard the rhythmic – albeit far too fast – thump, thump, thump that he let himself relax a little. He brushed the fringe from Harry’s eyes just as Chessie popped back in with a flushed looking Poppy who promptly scolded him.

“Severus! Don’t touch him until we know if he’s been cursed!” She waved her wand over Harry and studied the parchment it conjured.

He barely kept from rolling his eyes but continued to stroke the man’s hair. If Harry had been cursed it was already too late for Severus since he had checked Harry’s pulse.

A moment later Poppy sighed and nodded at Severus, clearly relieved. “Just a panic attack. Admittedly, a rather severe one. I’d certainly like to know what has him all worked up like this, but I'll venture a guess and say he came here to speak with you and not me, Severus. Please try to get him to relax?” She looked at Severus questioningly and only turned to leave when he nodded his assent.

Severus knew Harry would likely wake up at any moment so he levitated him to the couch and called for tea from Chessie, and then sat in the chair across from Harry and waited.

When Harry became aware of his surroundings again, he looked around to see if he had arrived at his hastily shouted destination. Based on the sofa he was now comfortably laying against and the cup of tea sitting on the tea tray in front of him, he had. His eyes travelled further across the table, over to the chair and the black, trouser-clad legs occupying them.

Harry sat up quickly, too quickly, and his vision swam, so he lay back down and closed his eyes.

Severus smirked at that knowing Harry couldn’t see it and cleared his throat. “And what, pray tell, gave you the idea that my quarters were a good place to be during a panic attack, Mr Potter?” he queried, aiming for an unaffected tone but not succeeding in completely hiding the concern from his voice.

Harry groaned. “M’ sorry, Severus. I didn’t. But I needed to show you what he did. Michael, he, he, the – “ Harry stopped, trying not to get worked up again, and sat up slowly. He needed Severus to read the agreement Michael had sent him, then he would understand. “I have to floo home for something, do you mind?” he asked Severus.

Severus waved his hand toward the fireplace. “Go ahead.” Whatever Harry needed to tell him was obviously important.

Nodding, Harry stood cautiously and then made his way over to the fireplace, before tossing floo powder in and sticking his head in to _accio_ the documents Michael had owled over. Once he had the papers in hand, he walked back to the sofa and thrust them at Severus before taking his seat again, hoping Severus would know what to do.

He glanced down at the sheaf of papers Harry had given to him briefly before looking at the man across from him. “When did you get these, Harry?”

Harry sighed and leaned against the back of the sofa. “Earlier tonight. I was reading them when I had a, um. Well, you know. When I panicked. I thought you might be able to help.”

Severus’ curiosity grew exponentially. “I will do what I can, but you need to keep very good track of the envelope these came in, Harry. It is magically traced. By wizarding law, you have 30 days to contest or make changes to anything in this agreement before it is filed at the ministry. Now,” He continued on when Harry opened his mouth to interrupt. “that does not mean everything has to be decided within the month, just that you have a month for an initial response. If you don’t respond within a month, the ministry will assume you agree to these documents and it will be filed as you see them here. Okay?” he raised a brow at Harry.

Harry nodded his head in return and slumped back to his previous position, and Severus began leafing through the pages. It was all very well written out, Anderson was obviously good at his job. And then he came upon the ‘Physical Custody’ section and realized what must have set Harry off.

He grit his teeth and read through the entire document before sliding them back across the table towards Harry. If it were any other person before him he would get up and pour himself something a bit stronger than tea, but Harry probably needed it far more than he did at this point and to wave it in front of the mans face right now when he was unable to drink it would be downright cruel.

Harry watched Severus contemplate the agreement from his spot on the couch. He could tell the man's brain was working faster than a seeker who had just spotted the snitch but his face gave away no clues so Harry just sat there and waited for him to speak. Severus had his long, pale fingers steepled in front of his face and his elbows resting on his knees; he looked every bit the intimidating man Harry knew him to be.

Eventually, when the silence went on for longer than Harry could stand it he spoke up. “Severus? What should I do? I can’t – I won't let him take her away from me. I should have listened to you. You told me he wasn’t a good person but I never thought he'd do something like this. Why would _anyone_ do something like this?” he asked, more to himself.

“Power,” Severus answered him anyways. “Control over you. Money. But the way I see it, you have three or four options. Would you care to hear them?” he asked in case Harry had only come over for a sounding board rather than actual advice.

Harry, however, perked up at that. “Yes, please. I’ve no idea what to do.”

He nodded. “For one, you could fight him in court. Prove you will be the better parent, the best option for the child to spend the majority – if not all – of their time with. Or, you could come to an agreement outside of a formal hearing. The ministry offers a service called mediation. It’s still legally binding, but not quite so stressful as it's not in front of an entire courtroom. Or, you can avoid the ministry altogether and see if you can work it out between just you and Mr Anderson.”

Harry sighed at this. He didn’t want the ministry involved, he just wanted a simple agreement so that Michael would have a chance to be a part of his daughter's life. Why was everything always such a disaster for Harry?

“You said three or four options. Was there something else you were thinking of?” he asked Severus hopefully.

Severus shook his head. “Unless you plan on running away with your baby and never coming back, no. That’s all I have. I truly am sorry, Harry.”

As soon as the words were out of Severus’ mouth they latched on to Harry's brain and wouldn’t let go. What would it be like if he tried to leave with his daughter, never to return? Would Hermione or even Draco miss him? Would Severus? Would he miss them in return? Harry knew he would, all three of them. They were the only people he socialized with now that he was pregnant, aside from Madam Pomfrey at his check-ups.

The rest of the wizarding world still detested him, probably always would and as it was he wanted to stay out of the public eye anyways. He didn’t care much what they thought about him, but he would be damned if they dragged his daughter into it.

“I can’t, even if I wanted to I couldn’t do it to Hermione. Besides, who would be here to keep you company on Sundays if I left, eh?” he said jokingly even though he was still rather upset.

Harry looked at Severus determinedly. “What do you think I should do? Do you think I should talk to him or try to fight it out with him in court?”

Severus considered it for only a moment. He didn’t think Anderson was being reasonable at all but wizarding custody cases were known to get brutal. “I think you should ask him to meet with you again and try to work it out without involving the ministry.”

“Can I use a quill and some parchment? I want to owl him and get this over with as quickly as possible.” He asked Severus.

Severus summoned a self-inking quill and a piece of parchment for Harry to use and watched as he scratched out a short note in his notoriously messy scrawl.

When Harry was done, Severus asked for Chessie to have the letter sent off as soon as possible.

“Yes, Master Severus.” She bowed and popped away to do as he asked. Severus turned back to Harry, who was still sat on the sofa and asked: “Would you like to remain here for a while, or floo back to your place?”

Harry was a bit surprised, he would admit. While they were getting along better he still knew Severus didn’t like to share his space and he thought for sure the man would kick him back to Godric’s Hollow as soon as he was sorted.

He smiled up at Severus. “I wouldn’t mind staying here for a while if it’s alright with you. I'm pants at chess but do you fancy a game of cards?”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

 

                  

                  

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After writing this chapter, I think, I THINK I have an idea for a sequel if anyone wants to read it - if this story continues on this way. But then who knows, because this story is already so different from what I first thought it would be. 
> 
> A fun little fact (for me anyways) - the gringotts vault number I used is tied to my nephew. 6/20/18 (his bday) 2:56 (time of birth) 2.01 (lbs at birth) 13 (inches at birth). I know. I'm weird haha.
> 
> *****So that no one misses it, this is on hiatus until June!*****


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very very short filler chapter, solely for the purpose of posting an update. Will post updates on the next chapter in end notes.
> 
> Also, some baby names are mentioned in this chapter, but none are settled on. If you have one you like, feel free to put it in the comments!

Chapter 5

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Sunday Lunch and Baby Names

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

It was Sunday afternoon, and Harry sat in his living room on the couch with his feet tucked up under his expanding stomach while he waited for Severus to come through the floo for lunch. They had made a habit of meeting up on Sundays, and Harry was coming to enjoy Severus’ company more and more.

Today for lunch was a simple chicken soup with some sourdough bread he had made from scratch. He absolutely loved baking, and baking for Severus even more because the man always seemed to be so surprised that Harry could make a passable meal.

Probably had something to do with his potions skills or lack thereof.

The floo flared, and Harry smiled in greeting at Severus. He was twenty weeks into his pregnancy now and having more trouble manoeuvring up and down off the couch, so he didn’t get up, but Severus had already made it clear that wasn’t necessary all the time anyway.

“Good afternoon, Harry,” Severus said with a nod in Harry’s direction.

“Hi, Severus. How was your week?”

The man groaned as he took off his cloak and sent it to hang on the coat tree next to Harry’s front door. “Dreadful. I never thought I would say it, but I would take Longbottom back over the idiots I have in class this year. Three melted cauldrons in one period! Never has a student been so…so…stupid! Not even a first year and Tuttle is a third year.” Severus ranted. During his entire miserable week, the only thing keeping him going was his lunch with Harry on Sunday, not that he would be admitting it to the man or anyone else any time soon.

More than ever before though, Severus looked forward to leaving the school and spending time with Harry. The more he got to know the man the more he wanted to be around him, the more attracted he was to him, the more he _liked_ him. He knew it was a tricky, dangerous line he was walking, but he’d been a spy for more than half his life. He could handle it.

He thought.

Harry chuckled. “Three cauldrons, eh? That has to be a record.” He said, looking at Severus who glared back at him for all he was worth. It didn’t faze Harry anymore, but it still got his point across. “I made chicken soup and sourdough. Are you hungry?”

Severus nodded and Harry put his feet down to stand up when Severus held out a hand to stop him. “You stay there. I know where everything is, I’ll serve this time. If that’s okay with you?” He asked.

Harry looked at him for a moment and then nodded. Severus left to the kitchen and came back a few minutes later with a large lunch tray that had their food on it, as well as tea that the man had prepared.

Harry looked from the tea to Severus and raised an eyebrow in question and the man looked only mildly embarrassed. “Occupational hazard.” Was all he said. Harry just shrugged and took his bowl of soup, tearing off a piece of bread to eat with it.

Lunch passed quickly. They talked about school and Draco’s wedding, the baby and what Harry would name her.

“I know everyone thinks I’ll want to name her Lily. But I don’t think I will. Maybe as a middle name?” Harry queried.

Severus nodded. “I admit I assumed you would name her that myself. Did you have something else in mind? Hermione, perhaps?” he smirked, and Harry knew then he was only joking.

Harry laughed out loud. “Oh, gods. Hermione would have a fit if I named her that. I think it would be too confusing. I don’t have anything in mind yet, but I’m thinking I want to name her something original, not after someone else where she feels like she has to measure up to someone, you know?”

“I think that’s very insightful,” Severus answered, a pensive look on his face.

Harry looked at him. “Were you named after someone?”

Severus shook his head. “No. Like you, only my middle name. My middle name also came from my father,”

Harry nodded. “It seems common in the wizarding world, the names I’ve heard anyways. Good thing I’ve got time to think about it. She’ll be stuck with this name for the rest of her life, so I have to make sure it’s right.” He said and put his bowl down on the coffee table.

He leaned back into the couch and sipped his tea, wishing this lunch didn’t have to end. He liked Severus more than he cared to think about and wished he could see the professor more often.

Severus hummed in agreement and conversation stalled until he stood. “I must get back to the school. I will see you on Wednesday, yes?”

Harry frowned. “Wednesday?” He didn’t have anything planned Wednesday, did he?

“You have a visit with Poppy, do you not?”

Comprehension dawned on Harry’s face. “Yes, I do. Are you going to that one, too?”

Severus froze. He hadn’t meant to be so presumptuous. “I mean, I just thought, if you- “ he stuttered out.

“It’s fine, Severus. I like having someone else there. Of course, you can come. I’ll be there at half nine.”

Severus walked to the floo and summoned his robes. “I shall see you then. Have a good week, Harry.”

Harry bid him goodbye and in a whirl of green flames, he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the deal - my life is a mess right now and it's taking everything I have not to abandon this story. I was just diagnosed with borderline personality disorder as well as ADHD, I just got back from an out of state weekend run, my meds have stopped working (again), my mother is moving into my house from out of state, and I'm still supposed to be caring for my nephew while his mother works full time as well as myself. But I'm going through this story and trying to get back into the flow so I can get another good chapter out. Hope this little chapter holds you over.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter - Snarry relationship development  
> Next chapter - plot development with Harry, Severus and Anderson
> 
> Sorry for the wait. Life got in my way. Shoutout to my brother who wrote a part of the dinner scene because writer's block is real and would not leave me alone.

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part 1: Plans

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Harry made his way somewhat nervously down to Severus’ quarters the following Wednesday after his exam was finished. He had seen Madam Pomfrey and the baby had checked out fine, but there had been no sign of Severus. So Harry had wished Poppy a Merry Christmas and set off for the dungeons.

He had to admit, if only to himself, that he was a bit worried as he knocked on the man’s door. Severus wasn’t the type of man to cancel on him without sending some kind of message. He was worried something bad had kept him from showing up. After several long moments though, Severus finally answered the door.

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Severus had heard the knock on the door and knew without a doubt that it would be Harry. He knew he would have to give him some sort of an explanation for his absence, but what could he say? How did he tell Harry that he was avoiding him because he was getting too involved emotionally? Severus didn’t _do_ emotional. He didn’t deal with feelings and wants and relationships and the sort of attraction he felt when he looked at one Harry Potter.

And the last thing he wanted to do was lose the tentative friendship they seemed to have formed, but he knew that’s exactly what would happen because Harry would never – could never feel the same about his worn-out old Potions Master.

But no longer could Severus deny it either. It was getting harder and harder to keep his distance, to stop himself from touching the man; pulling him close and kissing him senseless when he flashed Severus that beautiful smile of his, or winding arms around him from behind and wrapping around his smaller frame. Both things that Severus had fantasized about in the past days.

He was attracted to Harry, and not just physically. He actually liked the man. His intelligence, his humour, his heart. With a sigh, he left the kitchen where he’d been standing and went to answer his door and meet his fate.

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

 

Harry peered back at Severus from behind the door. “Hi. Is everything alright? You weren’t at the exam with Poppy this morning. I mean, not that you have to go, I just thought, well you –” Harry trailed off, unsure what to say.

Severus moved aside to let him in and followed the man into the living room with a bemused look on his face. Did Harry think he didn’t want to be there? That just wouldn’t do.

“My apologies, Harry. I did intend to be there, but I got so caught up in my thoughts that I lost track of time. I promise to be at the next one if you’re amenable?” Well, it wasn’t the entire truth, but it wasn’t a lie.

That earned him a smile that Severus couldn’t help but return.

“Of course, that’s fine. I was worried I’d done something.” The relief was evident in his voice and Severus felt immediately sorry. He didn’t know what Harry could possibly have done when they hadn’t even seen each other since Sunday, but he could have stopped those thoughts right in their tracks if he’d not been such a coward this morning.

He smiled faintly and sat down opposite Harry. “Everything is just fine, Harry. How did it go? Everything is well, I assume?”

Harry shrugged and looked away, and Severus was instantly on alert. “Harry? What’s wrong? Did Poppy say there’s a problem?”

“Not exactly. She’s a bit on the small side, but Poppy said that’s expected with my size and me being a man. She mentioned I should be on the lookout for something called ‘Braxton Hicks’ now that I’ve reached the halfway mark. She seems pretty convinced she’ll be coming early, though.” The look on Harry’s face told Severus all he needed to know. Harry was terrified for his baby girl, and he had every right to be. Male pregnancies were beyond dangerous; Harry had beaten the odds just making it this far.

“You will get through this, Harry.” It was the best comfort he could offer without lying. “Have you heard from Mr Anderson?” he decided to change the subject. Harry tensed up at Anderson's name, and Severus bit back a groan. What had the man done now?

“Yes. He’s _requested_ that we meet the Friday after New Year’s to finalize the agreement. I owled him to let him know there are changes I want to make before we finalize anything. I won't give my daughter up to that man or anyone else for that matter. The agreement he proposed is ridiculous. You should have seen the look on Hermione’s face when I showed her!” he told Severus.

That reminded him he wanted to ask the man a favour. “While we are on the subject, I wanted to ask you. If you don’t mind, if you’re not busy I mean, would- would you go with me? To meet with Michael? I know you don’t like him and you have no reason to go, but Draco barely seemed to hold his temper last time and I don’t want Michael to be any worse than he already is. I wouldn’t want to give him anything to use against me.”

Severus considered for a moment. He wasn’t sure he wouldn't be doing Harry a disservice by going with him, but Merlin forbid he go alone. It would be all too easy for Anderson to take advantage of Harry in this state. No. Severus wouldn’t allow it. The man had been through more than enough already. “I believe I can make arrangements to go. Did he tell you what time he would like to meet, or does he expect you to be at his beck and call for the entire day?”

“2 pm,” Harry replied.

He inclined his head. “Meet me here and I can apparate you there and save you the trouble. Now that’s settled, what are your plans for Christmas?” This was so unlike him; he was so back and forth. After avoiding him this morning, he was anxious to spend more time in the man's company, but he didn’t want to intrude on any plans he may have already set.

“Christmas?” Harry asked in a tone that implied Harry had never heard the term.

Severus stared at him, perplexed. Did Harry no longer celebrate? “Yes, Mr Potter. _Christmas_. You know, the holiday that a good portion of the world will be celebrating in one form or another tomorrow – exchanging gifts, eating food, spending the day with loved ones…” he trailed off at the look on Harry’s face.

Harry shrugged. “I haven’t got any plans. ‘Mione and Draco are spending today with her parents and tomorrow at the Manor. It’s not a big deal. I haven’t done much to celebrate since I left Hogwarts anyways. Hasn’t been much of a reason.” He had considered asking Severus over for Christmas dinner during their last Sunday lunch, but his inner thoughts about the man had stopped him from doing so.

He was more attracted to the man each time they got together, and he didn’t know what to do about it. With a baby on the way, a relationship as complicated as theirs was sure to be was the last thing he needed on his plate but the more he thought about it the more he wanted to just ask the man out for an actual date.

But he refused to do anything to risk his friendship with the man, and a failed date was sure to make things awkward.

Harry looked at Severus. “What are your plans Anything exciting?”

Severus shook his head. “Just the customary staff meeting for the few of us that are here so we can exchange gifts. After that, I usually come back to my quarters and grade papers with a glass of whisky. However,” he paused. He wasn’t sure what he was thinking, but he wanted this so bad. He decided to take a risk. “I have a different idea this year.”

“You have?”

“Mhmm. Would you care to hear it?”

Harry nodded.

“I’d like to come over and cook dinner for you.” Severus very nearly whispered the words and then held his breath while he waited for Harry’s response. Oh, Merlin, he hoped Harry said yes. He searched Harry’s face, looking for anything that would let him know what the other man was thinking while he considered Severus’ request.

Harry’s stomach dropped and his heart stuttered. Was this Severus asking for…? But no, it couldn’t be. This was only him taking pity on Harry not having any Christmas plans. Harry didn’t mind though if it meant more time with Severus, and dinner with him sounded nice. This meant Severus would be cooking for him for a change – and Harry was a little more than interested to see what that would be like since Harry always cooked for their Sunday lunches unless Severus brought something from the elves.

Harry realized he still hadn’t answered Severus and he smiled at the man. “I’d like that very much, Severus. Are there any groceries you would like me to pick up?”

Severus paused for just a moment to think before the perfect meal for a Christmas dinner for two came to mind, and then he shook his head in the negative. “I’ll bring what I need. If you’d like, could you get us something to drink? Sparkling cider, perhaps? I know you can’t have alcohol at this stage.”

Harry agreed readily; sparkling cider was a favourite of his. “Of course. I've got some at home already, I’ll have it chilled in the refrigerator.”

As Severus and Harry sat back and settled into their habit of talking about this and that, going on about one subject or another, Severus realized that this was the first time in Merlin knew how many years that he actually had plans for Christmas dinner.

He was determined to do this right, and have it go well. He may not have a chance in hell with Harry, but he could…he _would_ at least give him a good Christmas.

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part 2: Dinner

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Severus arrived on Harry's doorstep the following day at precisely 5 pm for dinner. He had decided to make for Harry a meal his mother used to make for him as a boy, on the rare occasions that his father was gone and she could cook as she pleased.

He was making them a classic steak and potatoes dish, pan-seared together in a cast iron skillet and topped with a special garlic herb butter that his mother had spent hours upon hours perfecting. Severus could have eaten this meal every day as a child and not grown tired of it.

Pulling himself from his memories he raised his hand and knocked on Harry’s door to announce his arrival, holding groceries in one hand and clutching a small gift for Harry under his other arm. The gift was last minute and not terribly personal, but the woman and the shop he’d bought it from assured him it would be well received.

Harry answered the door just a few moments later with a smile and ushered Severus in out of the freezing December cold. “Severus!” he exclaimed. “I was expecting you to floo over. It’s below freezing out there!”

Harry took the bags from him and carried them to the kitchen while Severus removed his winter cloak and gloves and hung them from the coat rack by the front door. He put Harry’s gift down on the coffee table and moved to warm his hands by the fire that was going, while Harry came back into the room and sat down, taking his usual seat and curling his feet under his belly the best he could these days.

Severus moved to sit down for a moment as well but then checked his watch and thought better of it. It was already fifteen past five and dinner would take half an hour.

“Harry, dinner preparations will take about half an hour, would you like me to cook it now?” he asked.

Harry nodded. “Yeah. I was a little bit queasy earlier so I didn’t eat a lot for lunch, but I’m hungry now. What are you cooking tonight?” He asked curiously. He hadn’t even thought to peek in the bags a minute ago, he had just put them all in the fridge.

“It’ll be a surprise if you don’t already know. I’ll go cook now.” He said and with that, left Harry in the living room so he could prepare their meal.

While he was in the kitchen cooking he set the table in the adjoining dining room, conjuring a red table cloth and a white candle to place in the centre of the table. Once he had their places set with plates and silverware, he plated their steaks, dishes out potatoes and green beans for each of them, and added the finishing touch of garlic herb butter onto the top of their steak. Satisfied with his presentation, he went to get Harry.

Severus walked into the living room to gather Harry and found the man snoozing on the arm of the couch, feet still tucked under him and one hand resting on his stomach. He thought Harry looked nothing short of adorable and he hated to wake him, but steak and potatoes were no good cold and Harry needed as much food as he could stomach.

He moved closer and placed a hand on Harry’s shoulder, nudging him slightly. “Harry. Harry, wake up. Dinner is finished.”

Harry groaned as he rolled his neck and opened his eyes. “ ’M sorry, Severus. I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you. I’m being a terrible host. I’ll get up and set the table.” He said, putting his feet on the floor to scoot forward and heave himself up off the couch. Severus stopped him with a hand.

“Calm yourself. It’s already done. And, the lack of energy at this stage is to be expected for you. Your body is not meant to be carrying a baby. I’m not upset over you taking a nap. In fact, I’m glad you weren’t just in here bored, twiddling your thumbs. Now, are you ready to eat?”

Harry flushed slightly but nodded. Now that attention had been called to his stomach, he felt as though he could eat an entire cow.

The two men walked into the dining room and when Harry saw the table, he stopped in his tracks. Harry’s dining room was set up for a very romantic dinner for two. Severus had gone all out. A beautiful, red tablecloth covered his wooden dining table, and right in the centre was what had to be a delicately crafted candle – that or some rather impressive spellwork – lighting the entire table. Gorgeous china that Harry had not seen before was laid out with their meal, steak and golden yellow potatoes. Just the sight of it was making Harry’s mouth water. And the smells. The smells coming from the food were indescribable.

Harry took a deep breath and turned to Severus, who he found watching him, waiting for his reaction.

“This is, it’s beautiful Severus. You did this all for me?” he asked.

Severus nodded.

“I- I don’t know what to say besides, well, thank you. You didn’t have to go to all this trouble for just me.

Severus walked around Harry and pulled out his chair for him, gesturing for him to sit as he did so. “You are very welcome, Harry.”

Harry took the offered seat and waited for Severus to take his own before picking up his fork and knife. Severus mirrored him and the two of them locked eyes for a long moment, neither of them willing to be the first to look away.

Harry was captivated, trapped almost, in the hungry, black stare that Severus was giving him. And Severus, likewise, was unable to drag his gaze away from the want and need that was showing so plainly on Harry’s face.

But that couldn’t be right. There was no possible way Harry was interested in him and so with a huge effort, he dragged his eyes down to look at his plate.

“Feel free to dig in, Harry. It’s much better when it’s hot and I really think you’re going to enjoy it.” Severus said.

Harry quickly shook his head, trying to clear the image of a clearly lustful Severus from his mind.

“Right, of course. It looks absolutely amazing.” He said, cutting into the steak, surprised to find that it was extremely tender and easy to cut. His mouth was watering now and he could smell the subtle but strong aroma of garlic.

He took a bite and let out a small moan as his palate was hit with a world of flavour. He could easily identify the thyme, rosemary, and oregano, but there was something that had just a hint of sweetness that Harry absolutely loved. He closed his eyes, relishing the flavour and taste of the steak and seasoning each time he bit down.

He swallowed his first mouthful and immediately wanted more. Opening his eyes, he looked over at Severus who was chewing on a piece of his own steak.

“Severus, I… This is incredible. I have never had something cooked so perfectly or taste so good. Where on Earth did you learn to make this?” Harry asked as he cut another piece of meat off and stuck it in his mouth. The second bite was just as good, if not better than the first. Harry was in awe.

Severus shifted slightly in his seat and did his best to ignore the small noises Harry probably had no idea he was letting out as he was eating so that he could answer the question.

“My mother taught me when I still lived at home. It was my favourite meal as a child. I’m glad you are enjoying it.” He answered.

Harry bit into his potatoes and let out another groan, and Severus idly wondered if he would be tortured all through dinner. Embarrassingly enough, his traitorous body was reacting to the sounds coming from Harry, and Severus knew he needed to distract himself. He started reciting the potions ingredients in his private lab, making sure to go in alphabetical order and list the rare ingredients separately. Thankfully, Harry was a quiet dinner companion, never talking much whilst eating his food, and dinner passed without a lot of conversation once he had given his compliments to the chef.

 

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Part 3: Presents and Surprises

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

When the two men had eaten their fill, Harry got up from the table and took their plates to the sink for washing and motioned Severus into the living room. “Thank you for dinner. I have a gift for you,” Harry said. “It’s not much, but I wanted to get you something.”

Severus smiled. “You didn’t have to get me anything, so whatever it is will be appreciated.” He assured Harry and got up to walk the few steps to the couch. Harry followed him and summoned a package from upstairs with difficulty, Severus watching him from the corner of his eye.

“Have you been having trouble with your magic?” Severus asked once they were seated.

Harry shrugged, plucking at a corner of the paper he hadn’t taped down properly. “It’s just taking longer to respond than usual. Madam Pomfrey says that it’s normal and that I can expect it to get worse before the baby comes.” He said and then handed over the package. “Here you go. Sorry about the wrapping job. I’ve always been crap at it.”

He was chattering on nervously, waiting for Severus to open his gift. Severus, for his part, seemed content to go as slow as he pleased, peeling the paper back piece by piece, revealing a small black leather box with a silver latch. Severus’ heart rate picked up. He knew what these were, had been eyeing them at the potions supply shop for months now. They just weren’t in a teachers budget.

He set the wrapping paper on the coffee table and smoothed a hand over the small box in his lap, looking up at Harry. Harry smiled at him and nodded, urging him to open the box. Severus lifted the latch and opened the lid, taking in the contents. Nestled snugly inside in black velvet slots were six different phials, each one different. Euclase, ruby, sapphire, emerald, diamond, and alexandrite.

“Harry, this- these are too much. I can’t accept these. I’ve seen how much these-“

Harry cut him off, not unkindly. “Severus, please. I want you to have these. I’m sure everyone gets you potions things for Christmas and I was hoping to find something a bit more personal but I didn’t have the time. The holidays sort of crept up on me this year…” he trailed off. It wasn’t a lie, either. He hadn’t paid attention to Halloween or Thanksgiving and probably would have ignored Christmas as well if it weren’t for Severus.

Severus stared at him, searching his face for long moments before looking away and standing up, coming to sit next to him on his side of the couch. He handed him a neatly wrapped package that was obviously a material item, and Harry took it gratefully.

Quite the opposite of Severus, Harry tore the paper off his gift like a kid with his first ever present. From the wrappings dropped a beautifully made light pink and cream coloured blanket of the softest material Harry had felt since he’d gotten his invisibility cloak.

A baby blanket. Severus had gone into a baby shop and gotten a gift for his baby daughter who wasn’t even here yet. He felt his eyes well up with tears and did what he could to stop them from falling.

Severus saw Harry’s eyes water and was horrified. Harry was crying?! Had he done something wrong? “It’s a baby blanket.” _That’s good, state the obvious, Severus._ “The shop owner informed me it was the best they had. It has charms on it to keep the baby warm in the winter and cooler in the summer so she can use it year round. She told me it’s a great gift, one of their most bought items. I just thought you might like oomph-“

Suddenly. Severus had his arms full of Harry. The man wasn’t openly crying but Severus could feel him struggling, holding back. Slowly, carefully, Severus set the box of phials aside and put his hands on Harry’s back, tentatively rubbing them up and down in an effort to comfort him. He could feel his breath ghosting over Severus’ neck, his arms tightening like Harry wasn’t planning to let go. His glasses were pressed uncomfortably into the side of Severus' face and Harry’s hair was tickling his ear.

But having Harry in his arms like this was the closest he’d ever been to heaven. If only he knew what he’d done to deserve it.

For a blissful minute, he sat there holding Harry, rubbing his back and comforting him. He would have sat there all night but he felt Harry shift so he pulled back and looked at the man next to him.

“Harry?” he questioned a bit nervously. “What did I do?”

Harry turned his face away and tried to rub his face on his sleeve, but Severus wouldn’t let him. He took Harry’s face gently in his hands and turned him to look Severus in the eye. “Please. Look at me. What is it, Harry?”

Harry sniffed and closed his eyes for a moment before looking Severus in the eye and speaking. “You bought her a gift. You care about her.”

Severus cleared his throat and shifted his body uncomfortably. Of course, he cared about her. She was an extension of Harry. Harry had to realize that, didn’t he?

“I did. I do.”

A tear slipped down Harry’s face. “I just, she has no one but me. It’s just me. No one cares about her, except me. And then…you.” He said, his voice overwhelmed with gratitude. He knew Severus would understand what he was saying. What it was like. His baby girl had no one to focus on _just_ her. Hermione and Draco were in their own world preparing for their wedding, he had no family or other friends to speak of. Michael Anderson seemed to just want to take her away. It was just him. Harry was all she had.

More tears made their way down Harry's face, and Severus could stand it no longer. Bringing one hand up to cup Harry's jaw, he leaned in, intent on kissing the mans tears away. He moved slowly, slow enough to give Harry time to stop him, and then lightly kissed Harry’s cheek, tasting the salty wetness that was there.

He heard Harry release a shaky breath and seconds later there was a hand on his chest. His breathing sped up, and the room around him narrowed down to just him and Harry. He kissed his other cheek before pulling back and looking at the man. Harry had his eyes closed, a look of content on his face like nothing Severus had ever seen before.

Severus knew it then. It was now or never. He wouldn’t get a chance like this again.

Leaning forward once more, he let his lips brush lightly across Harry’s, praying to Merlin he’d made the right choice.

When Harry leans into it, he knows he has.

They sit like that for long seconds, just moving their lips, not deepening the kiss but not pulling away, until the need for air becomes too great. Harry still has his hand on Severus while he takes in deep breaths and wipes away the last of his tears and finally, _finally_ , he looks up at Severus’ lust filled eyes.

“You kissed me,” Harry said.

Severus had to clear his throat before he could speak. “I hope that was okay.”

Harry smiled and nodded slightly, still looking intently at Severus. “It was. More than okay.” He said as he leaned in again for another kiss. He could remember the last time he’d had a Christmas as good as this one.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The comments on the last chapter were overwhelming. I didn't get a chance to respond to them, but the support from you guys is unbelievable. I am doing my best to take care of myself, I have an awesome therapist and a very supportive family. I do not intend to abandon this fic. In fact, I'm just getting started. Thanks for reading and being so understanding. Hope you liked this chapter!


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